Needed: Good men, and not just a few

On autism, and painting the garage with mustard

Do not rebuke an older man sharply, but appeal to him as you would to a father; treat younger men like brothers, older women like mothers and younger women like sisters, with absolute purity. 1 Timothy 5:1,2

Therefore be imitators of God as dear children. And walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling aroma. Ephesians 5: 1,2

The other night a memory came to me as I had just settled myself on the couch to watch some TV. I was trying to arrange my head on the square, hard couch pillow which was obviously meant for decoration and not for comfort. I remembered how my Dad would arrange beds for us on the floor by the fire. He loved doing that for us and it always bothered him to see me laying on the floor without a pillow.

I can’t count the times I would feel his hands under my head…..”Here, I brought you a pillow, he’d say.” The thought almost brought me to tears. I don’t think anyone ever did that for him, but he did it for me. And my brother. And I have seen him do it still even at 85. Some things never change.

I was thinking about how our whole society would benefit from good men. We need you, guys. So much more than you know. There’s a vast ocean of kids that are being raised without Dad’s. And a vast ocean of grown-ups who never had the benefit of being protected, feeling safe, being loved by a Dad.

Men, we need you. The church needs you too.

We need you to be strong and lead your families, not with an iron fist of authority, but with an open hand ready to give…… show love. A hand that is not afraid to grasp the hand of his child and lead with affection, with kindness, with the leadership and example of our Father in Heaven.

We need you to get up on Sundays and lead your family into church.

We need you to not be afraid to show emotion and to be quick to apologize when you are wrong…… talk about nothing in particular, just talk.

To spend time with your kids doing the little things that are important to them and make an effort to find out what those little things are. Find out what they like, what interests them. And don’t think you must have a big grand plan. Just be willing to do nothing with them. Jump into the middle of their life.

Wear a tiara if you have to. Jump rope. Help with a science experiment. And don’t worry if you aren’t any good at the activity, they don’t care. They just want you to do it with them. In fact, they might like it if you aren’t any good. That way they can feel good about teaching you something.

Be humble, men. Be kind. Be strong enough to answer with a soft voice.

And you men of faith? You have an even bigger responsibility, because your real Dad is God. And He is watching how you treat children, women, other men, boys. What a wonderful opportunity you have. To be a kind man…….there seem to be so few now. But I know you’re out there. You never know who you might reach.

There is a child out there, a woman out there, a boy out there who never had a Dad. Maybe never had a man in their life they could trust.

Be that man to them.

Be a representative to them of Your Abba, Father.

Don’t you know that your love can send a much more powerful message than telling them what they need to hear?

You have a unique opportunity and it’s up to you to show the love of God by demonstration, not by words.

There are a few men I work with whom I really respect. Those men would never let a door slam in my face. Those men, always hold a hand out and let me go down the stairs first. Those men let me enter a door first, because they know that God is watching what they do.

Don’t be afraid if women look at you funny. I think inside they really respect that, I know I do. Do the right thing no matter what someone else says.

Teachers, Bus drivers, Uncles, Fathers, Cousins, Brothers, Sunday School teachers, Bosses, Garbage collectors. Step up.

Because we all need you, good men and not just a few.

We appreciate you!

photo taken by me: My brother and his girl, Lauryn

4 thoughts on “Needed: Good men, and not just a few

  1. I have a moment etched in my memory as a boy when I was suffering from an earache. My dad, (I think because he didn’t want me to hurt anymore and not knowing what else to do), handed me a red handkerchief for comfort. I believe it was a little bundle of love. Yes, the church needs men. I think if more men put God in His right place in their home a magnificent revival would occur.

    1. Isn’t it amazing how those little things can have such an impact? I guess we should never underestimate those little kindnesses we do. The memories and impact are far reaching, even into adult years. Thank you Joel, for reading AND commenting. Lori

  2. I didn’t have a strong father figure growing up. My dad was usually aloof and didn’t seem to care that much about me. I think my childhood has shadowed my current state. It’s hard for me to relate to God as Father, thinking Him more as a ever-watchful cop than a loving and caring father. But I’m learning and leaning — ever so little step-by-step to let other men into my life and giving my trust to God.

    1. Thomas, thank you for reading! It must be very hard indeed to relate to God the Father if you haven’t had a strong and loving Dad to demonstrate what that kind of unconditional love look like. My Dad didn’t have it, in fact to this day he struggles to reconcile how his Dad left the family (and him) when he needed him the very most. They did reconcile after my Dad got married and had us, but he never really dealt with all those feelings and he is 85 now and still sufferes scars. I think it was because he never got the real apology from his Dad that he needed. Anyway, it seems to be very common for people to have these issues. Really, I think we all kind of think of God as a cop waiting to “bust us” when we don something wrong instead of he compassionate loving Father He is. We are all learning. Thankful for being faithful! Bless you and yours……Lori

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