Meditating on His Love

“Therefore I am now going to allure her;
I will lead her into the desert
and speak tenderly to her.
There I will give her back her vineyards,
and will make the Valley of Achor a door of hope.
There she will sing as in the days of her youth,
as in the day she came up out of Egypt.
“In that day,” declares the LORD,
“you will call me ‘my husband’;
you will no longer call me ‘my master.
Hosea 2:14-16

This is how much He loves us!

Why is it always easier to anticipate God’s wrath than to perceive God’s joy? Ever expecting to be shot, we’re invariably dumbfounded by a grace we can’t conceive. Belden C. Lane, The Solace of Fierce Landscapes
Kind of like finding water in the desert……
Who has measured the waters in the hollow of his hand,
or with the breadth of his hand marked off the heavens?
Who has held the dust of the earth in a basket,
or weighed the mountains on the scales
and the hills in a balance.
Isaiah 40:12
Sometimes you don’t need very many words at all, you just need to sit quietly and and find His love in the stillness of little moments throughout the day….and always, remember to listen to the birds no matter what.

My favorite Bible

I have several Bibles, but there is one that is my favorite. I call it “Big Red.” I purchased it as a special edition they had available at church after I attended a “Walk thru the Prophets” seminar back in 1980. When I first got it, I had just re-committed my life to Christ and so I clung to it as a life preserver, devouring its pages. I thought it was the most beautiful Bible I had ever seen. The gilding on the side had a magical sheen to it and I loved the way it looked as the lamplight hit it. I drank it in like the bread of life that it is.
It has many pages of notes taken from many different sermons, Bible studies, and thoughts of my own thrown in. I can page through them and see a bit of my personal history, and it warms me to see all that God has done through the years. I see the year our choir performed Handel’s Messiah and my brother gave his life to the Lord, gallantly striding up the aisle in his white shirt, a grown man looking purposeful and humble all at the same time.  Thoughts I wrote that same morning sitting out in my parent’s yard on Easter, just before the sun came up. I can still feel the peaceful beauty of that morning like a cloak wrapped around me.  
I see a bit of my church history also, which is rather colorful. There are notes from churches I attended in my hometown of Lodi California, Sacramento, Woodbridge, and Chandler and Mesa, Arizona.
It started out Burgundy red leather, and rather stiff, but now it is faded and supple. I had to glue the spine back together  awhile back, and time has dulled the luster of gold from the edges. The words within, however, burn brighter than ever. They have not faded, but only become more brilliant with time. 
There were also seasons in my life when it collected dust, I thought my own wisdom was better.  
There are yellow highlights all the way through it, although much more in some places than others, and there are places where tears of both sorrow and joy have spilled onto the pages. Everyone who touches it touches a part of me. The words in it have comforted me more times than I can count and it comes along to my “closet” when I pray. It is my faithful companion.
Bibles have always played a special part in many family histories. My Mom has my Grandfather’s German Bible, and I have my Mom’s special one, which used to be mine. Remember “The Way” version that came out in the seventies? My best friend has her Grandmother’s and Grandfather’s and I also have my late husband’s Bible that he got from an old girlfriend!
My Grandmother thought that all Bibles had to be black (or white for Baptism) and she only recognized the King James version.
How about you? Do you have a favorite? What has it meant to you? I would love to hear about it!
“Thy word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.” Psalm 119:105

Starting the Day Right


PSALM 143:8-10

Let the morning bring me Word
of your unfailing love,
for I have put my trust in you.
Show me the way I should go,
for to you I lift up my soul.
Rescue me from my enemies, O Lord,
for I hide myself in you.
Teach me to do your will,
for you are my God;
may your good Spirit
lead me on levelground.

I started the day the only safe way to start it….By rolling out of bed, placing my forehead to the carpet and uttering a prayer….first for strength, then a thank you for another day on the earth….for my health, for the miracle of being able to start again. All over the world, others are waking too. Some with prayers, some with curses, some with a combination of both.

Really, I start the day with an advantage. An advantage of weakness. A knowledge that I can’t do this on my own. When I am off work, I don’t start off nearly this needy. But I should, since I have no guarantee of what may happen on any given day only that You walk beside me.

So I gave my day over, and whatever happens. God is in it. And it will be good because He is with me.

The most wonderful moment of the day is that when creation in it’s innocence asks permission to “be” once again, as it did on the first morning that ever was. Thomas Merton

Merry-Go-Rounds and Roads

Looff Carousel 1911, Santa Cruz Boardwalk

Many summer weekends were spent at the Santa Cruz Beach Boardwalk when I was a kid in California. Disneyland had nothing on it as far as I was concerned. It was pure magic. Oh, the memories of that Boardwalk! Corn dogs, called Pronto Pups that seemed a foot high, entering the Fun house through the clown’s mouth, riding the train and anticipating when that roaring dinosaur was going to rise up from the lake, standing at the fudge shop window watching the taffy pulling machine, mesmerized as it pulled and pulled and never broke. And the beach…..

Holding it all together in the middle of that magic, the piece De resistance was the Carousel. All I had to do was hear that organ music and I was over the top. Keep in mind, I camped growing up. We didn’t stay in fancy hotels. We didn’t have the money and also, my folks thought is was important to teach us about nature. I’m so glad they did. So this Merry-Go-Round was for me, the highlight of our visit. I had my favorite horses, always the ones with head reared back, teeth bared. (I must’ve thought those went faster)

I am happy to say that my niece has inherited my love of this Merry Go Round as well. I got to go on it with her one of my trips back home and I felt the same rapturous joy as I did all those years ago. My brother even caught the ring!

What started this whole memory was that my friend and I were talking after church Sunday and I asked her if she got excited about that Merry Go Round as well, since she used to go there as a kid too. I expected her to light up with the same memory I had. “No,” she said, “I never really saw the purpose, you just go round and round and never get anywhere.” Well, yeah, there is that…..Instead, she shared a special memory of her own with me. She said one of the highlights of her childhood was when she and her brother got a quarter a-piece and went to the store and each picked out a matchbox car. Back then they came in a little box. Her job was to build the roads.

They would come home and she would build elaborate structures out of mud, complete with bridges with support beams underneath, freeways, overpasses, and tunnels. Even back then, she had the mind of an engineer. Her parents never even knew it. When she went to high school and tested extremely high in math and engineering, the counselor told her she better think of something else to do with her life, “because girls just don’t do these things.” After that she pretty much lost interest in the whole educational system.

But God doesn’t care about what some counselor says. Years later she ended up doing engineering work anyway at Intel, Corp. And she is still building things. She can visualize anything and build it, she is a project queen and should definitely have her own show on HGTV. She is a bridge builder between people, in every job she has ever had, she has been asked to be a mediator when situations needed smoothing out.

When God creates you to do a certain thing, it glorifies Him when you are doing those things!

I have always felt a compulsion to write, and I know that comes from God. That is how He created me. Sometimes I have no idea if anything I write makes sense but I still do it because I feel it’s one of the things God made me to do. Sometimes I feel my prayers go round in circles because I still see so many things in me that need changing. But as I look back at all these quiet times of prayer, I see a closeness I have with the Lord now that I didn’t have before. It is a beautiful sculpture that I can only see glimpses of, but when I close my eyes it comes into focus. I see and hear the music, the colors, the joy….and God behind it all. Sometimes life does seem like one big circle, but we can say, victoriously, this is a circle that has purpose. It has no end, and it only gets better!

Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians 13:12,13

Prayer for the Orphans

Painting by Thomas Kennington

Lord, I pray for your dear ones waiting for loving arms to surround them and for the fear and hopelessness that comes when no one arrives….Every child deserves to know that they have a place in someone’s heart, that they are worthy of love, that they don’t have to go through a hard life alone. I pray that we, your church would swallow up every last orphan, Lord until there are none left to wonder if they are loved, if they are worthy.

I pray for the courageous ones who have already stepped up, been obedient to Your word, sometimes at their own personal sacrifice. They are storing up treasure in Heaven as they care for Your own little treasures here on earth. I know Lord, that there are many different kinds of orphans and I pray for these too. These orphans of divorce, who sometimes wonder where they belong or who they belong too as they are passed back and forth from home to home to home, and I pray for the guilt that comes for all involved, and for Your healing touch for everyone in this kind of heartache today.

I pray also for those orphans who have two parents, but absent ones, indifferent ones, ones who know nothing about their own children as they run around doing everything else, but spending time with them, nurturing them, caring for them, knowing what they like to do, what little joys they hold dear.

I am humbled and so grateful Lord that I had parents who loved me and a home, a place. Everyone needs and deserves this, Lord. And remind me that to whom much is given, much is required….

“Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world. James 1:27

Go here, here and here to see some wonderful people who are making a difference.


Celebrating my praise and thanksgiving today with hopes that others can know, #442 the feelings of belonging that come with a father’s loving touch, #443 a mother’s arm around the shoulders, #444 a brother’s gentle teasing and the love that is behind it, #445 a home to run to in the rain, #446 a mother’s call for dinner, #447 knowledge that you have people behind you when life gets tough, #448 a knowledge of a Father in heaven who loves them, #449 knowing even when you are far away, that place remains in your heart, #450 knowing someone cares about what matters to you.

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God speaks…..


Continuing along the lines of yesterday……

The clouds and thunderstorms have been so magnificent lately I seemed to be stuck on the theme of nature and finding God’s power in it. In reading parts of Job this morning, I was struck again by the immense and beauty and perfection of God and His creation.

Elihu speaks to Job:

“He loads the clouds with moisture; He scatters His lightning through them. At His direction they swirl around over the face of the whole earth to do whatever He commands them. He brings the clouds to punish men, or to water the earth with His love….Listen to this Job; stop and consider God’s wonders.” Job 37:11-14

Imagine Job, who had suffered more than any man on earth. His losses were incomprehensible. Then he had to sit and listen to his friend rattle on about God’s mighty attributes, as he was scraping his terrible sores with pottery shards. Job could have given Elihu the speech himself, being the righteous man that he was. Job was a man that had a great relationship with God, although he had to wonder where God was at that point….but then God shocks them both with showing up!

God talks, Job listens:

“Then the Lord answered Job out of the storm, He said: Who is this that darkens my counsel with words without knowledge? Brace yourself like a man; I will question you, and you shall answer me. Where were you when I laid the earths foundation? Tell me if you understand. Who marked off its dimensions? Surely you know!” Job 38:1-5

God is not beyond using a little sarcasm to prove His point here, can you hear it behind the words?

Nearly every argument on the problem of pain appears somewhere in the book of Job, but the arguing never seems to help poor Job. He is suffering a crisis of relationship more than a crisis of intellectual doubt. Through it all, Job steadfastly refuses to turn his back on God. He has only one request: to hear from God in person. He wants an explanation right from the source.

At last Job gets his wish. God answers Job with a speech often quoted for its majesty and beauty. In a touch of sweet irony, God makes His entrance just as Elihu is explaining why Job cannot expect a direct answer from God. Job has saved a long list of questions, but it is God who asks the questions, not Job…..brushing aside 35 Chapters worth of debates on the problem of pain, God plunges instead into a dazzling poem on the wonders of the natural world.

Astonishingly, the question of suffering itself does not even come up in God’s speech. Yet somehow Job seems satisfied–humiliated actually.
(Taken from Student Bible Commentary notes, by Philip Yancey and Tim Stafford)

“I know that You can do all things; no plan of Yours can be thwarted…..Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know.” And then I love how this ends, “After Job had prayed for his friends, the Lord made him prosperous again and and gave him twice as much as he had before.” Job 42:2,3,10

God is not immune to our suffering. He is there in the midst of it, even when it seems He is nowhere to be found.

I’m listening, God.


God has a way of making us sit up and pay attention. He does this many different ways. Life events, accidents, close calls, His word, other people. There are some things you just shouldn’t ignore. We hear the warning bells and we just keep plodding ahead anyway, as we straighten our blinders. All the while God is saying, “I really wouldn’t do that if I were you.”

Sometimes nature gets our attention too. I love nature because God has left His imprints everywhere in it. In the calm of the sea after a storm, in the beauty and hush of a snowfall, in the roar of the waves and the warmth of the sun…… Sometimes people get so caught up in nature they start to worship it instead of God.

Nature certainly got our attention the other night. We were sitting at the neighbor’s house calmly talking, when we heard a “Woosh!” of wind and then a loud bang. We thought someone crashed into the carport! It is very interesting what happens in a situation like that. Not one of us sat and thought about whether we would get up and investigate, we all just sprang into action. The only one that didn’t is on oxygen and very elderly, but she was on her way out of her chair too, calling out for us all to be careful!

It was a summer storm, a microburst that came through, bringing with it high winds, rain, and thunder and lightning that was very close. Not unusual for Arizona this time of year. It was a rubbermaid chair exchange, Bob’s chairs flew across the street and Larry’s chairs came over to Bob’s house! Nobody was hurt and no property damaged, luckily. It did set our hearts to pounding though.

It is good to pay attention; to nature and to God. Mostly God. Sometimes nature reminds us that He is ultimately in control of everything. I like that reminder.

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth should change and though the mountains slip into the heart of the sea; though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains quake at its swelling pride. Selah. The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our stronghold. Selah. Psalm 46:1-3,7

Finding grace along the path


On hearing it, many of his disciples said, “This is a hard teaching. Who can accept it?”

Aware that his disciples were grumbling about this, Jesus said to them, “Does this offend you? What if you see the Son of Man ascend to where he was before! The Spirit gives life; the flesh counts for nothing. The words I have spoken to you are spirit and they are life. Yet there are some of you who do not believe.” For Jesus had known from the beginning which of them did not believe and who would betray him. He went on to say, “This is why I told you that no one can come to me unless the Father has enabled him.”

From this time many of his disciples turned back and no longer followed him. “You do not want to leave too, do you?” Jesus asked the Twelve. Simon Peter answered him, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. We believe and know that you are the Holy One of God.” Book of John

I think this is the wisest thing Peter ever said. I have wondered about this passage many times. I wonder how these disciples could have been with Jesus, witnessed miracles, and still turned away? To me it is one of the saddest passages in Scripture. Sadder still because I think of my own times of turning away. Moments, years, where I went my own way, did my own thing. Keeping Jesus in the background was my own form of turning away.

But God in His great mercy, pulled me back in, as He did Peter….”But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers.” Luke 22:32

The more I experience His grace, the less I look back. Like Peter, I can echo, “Where would I go Lord?” There is nothing in the world that I would trade for my relationship with the Lord. Each day that goes by gives me another opportunity and reason to say, “Yes, Lord, I am staying on Your path because it is the only one worth walking down, even when the way is rocky and I can’t see my way around the next bend in the road, because You are on it with me.”

With His Grace, we get the strength to keep walking!

Heaven at the water park

Weber Point Park, Stockton, California

My brother took my little niece to a park last weekend where they had an interactive water feature. My Mom and Dad went along too, although my Mom was not going to go at first. Sitting at a park is not really her idea of fun at 81 years of age, with two knee replacements behind her. She says they never have enough benches. But she ended up going anyway and had a great time.

Lauryn is slightly Autistic, so they weren’t really sure how she would handle it, since there were so many kids of all different ages. Usually, if Lauryn sees water anywhere there is no way to keep her out of it, but there was this multitude of kids factor, so they decided to just wait and let her watch for awhile.

For a time, she crept around the outskirts. She watched all the activity and battling within herself, she started to circle closer and closer. Slowly the lure of the water overcame her trepidation of all the other kids and she plunged in. Oh what joy! She played for two hours nonstop. My Mom, always with her Spiritual eyes and ears open, sensed that she was witnessing something that held an important lesson for all of us.

Here they were, all different kids, all different races, all different ages, and all of them so caught up in the joy, the glee of playing, that the thought never occurred to them not to get along. Kids have no clue, no awareness of their differences until we make them aware of it. That is, they see the differences, but it doesn’t really matter to them.

At one point, Lauryn and another kid, a bigger kid, were running to the same rock to sit down on when the water stopped. My Mom wasn’t sure what would happen, but the kid happily gave up the rock for Lauryn. Yes, a bit of Heaven right there.

It was, she said, “a bit like Heaven will be.” That was Jesus prayer when He said, “Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in Heaven.” Are we there yet? Is it possible? Absolutely it is. We see it happen everyday, in worship centers, at sports events, at movies, restaurants. Different people getting along. We see it in catastrophes too, (think 9/11).

So I think our next team builder at work should be at a water park, and everybody has to go in and get wet!

After this I looked and there before me was a great multitude that no one could count, from every nation, tribe, people and language, standing before the throne and in front of the Lamb. They were wearing white robes and were holding palm branches in their hands. And they cried out in a loud voice: “Salvation belongs to our God, who sits on the throne, and to the Lamb.” Revelation 7:9,10

Prayers with no words….

Windows at St. Mary’s Church, Google Images

Forever O Lord, Thy Word is settled in Heaven……Psalm 119:89

This morning I let my prayer be silence. I meditated on everything I have prayed for before. God has them, I know it. Safe in His golden bowl, He keeps them. This morning it seemed right to just give Him a silent offering. I made a blank canvas, as blank as I could anyway, thoughts always seem to crowd in, and carved out an empty place for God to fill.

Today I rest in who He is, I meditate of His power, glory, omnipotence, love….

Sometimes you just need to see what comes back in the silence, so I made my soul as still as an empty church. Sometimes you just need to make yourself a living Psalm, fill yourself up with your need for God, your need for answers, your need to know He is listening. So today I sat in the hush of His peace, silence of no words. The mourning dove cooing on the eaves of the neighbor’s roof prayed eloquently for me today.

In meditating on His strength, I become acutely aware of my weakness and utter inability to do anything apart from Him. That is a good place to start the day.

After all, as the Psalmist says…..Forever O Lord, Thy Word is settled in Heaven……Psalm 119:89Whatever happens and however out of control you feel, God remains in control. This is a comforting thought.

Thankful today for the peace that only He can give……#411 doves gentle call, #412 prayers in silence, #413 soft music that soothes, #414 the wisdom of His word spoken through wise friends, #415 cats soft purr, #416 real hugs, #417 laughter that heals the soul, #418 much needed rain in the desert, #419 family that taught me His love, #420, the Holy Spirit who puts our soul at rest…..
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