“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” John 14:27
Lately, it has been hard to keep emotion under control. Always, it threatens to break like a breach in a dam when it finally gives way. She is in the last stages, (she sincerely hopes) of placing her Mom in a care facility. In between her bus route this morning she was doing her other job, collecting paperwork for the placement process. If you are a private pay patient it’s a whole different scenario; they wave you in like royalty, roll out the red carpet, fresh flowers in the room and all that, but her Mom is not. When you are dependent on the State, you have to jump through hoop after hoop. Today was yet another visit by yet another case worker. And really, they have been very cooperative….for that we are thankful.
But lately, she has begun to lose hope in the process. It is wearing her down.
Behind weary eyes she confides her fears……”It’s not going to happen, I’ve resigned myself to it.” She feels like giving up, and I am doing my level best to convince her that we are at the tail end. Right now, that’s my whole goal, to give a fresh supply of hope. To help her along and be her strength when she has none.
Just now, as I type this, her Mom is taking a plate of food out to the living room, balanced precariously. I know that potato chip crumbs will end up all over the floor I just vacuumed. But that part doesn’t matter anymore. That’s small stuff.
When you are a caregiver it seems like nobody notices all the hundreds of little things you do, certainly not the one you are caring for. Sometimes you need a little verification that God sees you, that He’s still there. Today, as she was finishing up at her Dad’s care home she noticed two folded pieces of paper half hidden under a tire. Something made her stop and pick them up. Opening them, she found two beautifully handwritten pages of prayers:
Two pages of hope.
At the top of each prayer was a verse:
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. John 14:27
Who is God besides the Lord? And who is the Rock except our God? 2 Samuel 22:32
Just when she needed it most, a sign…..and those notes may as well have floated down from Heaven itself. I would love to know who wrote two such beautiful prayers. They must have needed some confirmation as well. I find myself wondering what set of circumstances led them to it? We will probably never know, but I would love to tell them how much their words helped.
To honor the one who prayed I am including one of them below:
Often, when people are experiencing problems, or if they need advice, they turn to a friend for help. But human effort always falls short. If you find yourself in a difficult situation, don’t underestimate the power and love of God. Complete healing flows from an absolute and unconditional trust in and surrender to the living Christ. It doesn’t matter what your problem is, the only lasting solution is to be found in the unfathomable love which God through Jesus, bestowed on humanity. Never be too proud or too afraid to turn to Jesus. Lay all your problems at His feet. He gave His life for you and will grant you the healing balm of His peace.
I want to hold on to you Lord, when the storm winds blow and I feel insecure. Grant me your peace. Amen.
An unknown writer
This is our miracle today. I thank you, whoever you are who wrote that. I hope you found the help and peace you were looking for, we certainly did.