Top of the Morning

 

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I think the closest we get to Heaven is right before the sun comes up. Before everything starts to stir, before the mind goes into overdrive. The start to the day is Holy for me anyway. Maybe for you it’s different.

I love the padding around in the quiet, hearing the coffee maker as it sputters to life brewing promise. Even the pop of the cat food tin and four bright eyes looking up, the mad dash across my feet as I open the door, its always Sydney.

I know just a tiny bit of how God must have felt after Creation, because the calm order of everything is good. As of yet, no one and nothing comes pounding at the door of my heart or mind. If I had a porch I would be on it.

No decisions have to be made yet, this is coasting time. The lead bird calls the morning to order only one, it’s the Mockingbird at four, then a different bird takes the later shift at six.

My soul still feels the hope of newness to it. I may not know where I will be in 1 year or 3 or five, but the steadiness of right here right now makes me think I could go on right here indefinitely. Right here in the dark quiet of early morning, it’s possible to think so anyway.

I lay my heart open to God who knows everything in it but loves to hear me tell it anyway. As any good parent should. Here, before everything goes into motion.

The candle on the roll-around flickers as I whisper my worries and hopes and dreams into the air, against the background rumble of traffic going in fits and starts out on the road.

To the One who still and always has everything under control.

As light fills the sky, a little panic hits. I open my devotional and read these words…….”Do not fear, for I am with you. Hear me saying, “Peace be still, to your restless heart.” Tears sting and from nearby a dove calls, heart calms a little and…….

I gasp, “How, did you know?”

Can I get a witness?

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Devotional: “Hold my hand in childlike trust, and the way before you will open up step by step.” Sarah Young, “Jesus Calling.”

This morning prayer time was something of a miracle. Well, they all are really, but some more than others. Sometimes I just go out there and sit. I know He is there, He just doesn’t make Himself known. It still amazes me how I can come out here with all my junk, all my worries and fears and He reveals Himself to me. And for just a little awhile, it’s just Him and me. I recognize Him and I feel a little bit like Mary Magdalene in the garden…….as she gasps, “Rabboni!”

Or John as he turns to Peter and says, “It is the Lord!” And there’s Jesus on the shore stoking a campfire asking if they’ve caught any fish. And sitting there in prayer, it feels a little bit like Easter.

There is something Holy in being present when dawn colors the sky. Being a witness to it is beholding His Glory here on earth. As if to second that, from the rooftop a mourning dove coos. That doesn’t always happen but today it did.

I am learning that even things like despair have a purpose, God never wastes anything. For in it, there is no denying that those sparks of joy are coming directly from You Lord.

It was a good prayer time today, well they all are really.

And after months of not attending church, of having my own church where and when I can have it, I need to hear the words……I need to hear the songs.

“As for me, it is good to be near God. I have made the Sovereign Lord my refuge; I will tell of all Your deeds.” Psalm 73:28

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