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New every morning

It always amazes me, that we can feel……have…..know, the power of the resurrection each new morning. I didn’t feel very resurrected this morning at all, when I climbed into my sweats and went out to pray in the half light. But by the time I came out? I was a new creation. And once again I felt Easter. Each day somehow we get the strength to get up and do it all over again.

That’s the power of the resurrection, the power of the cross, the power of the empty tomb! Hallelujah……

I offer this poem to you this morning…….It moved me:

Psalm by Thomas Merton

When no one listens to the quiet trees,

when no one notices the sun in the pool

When no one feels the first drop of rain

Or sees the last star

Or hails the first morning

Of a giant world

Where peace begins and rages end:

One bird sits still

Watching the work of God:

one turning leaf,

two falling blossoms,

Ten circles upon the pond……..

from Conjectures of a Guilty Bystander…..full poem available there.

Random Thoughts on a Saturday

 

It’s been a long week. I am still lamenting the absence of turkey leftovers in the fridge. I could just taste it….mayo, big chunks of meat, dressing and a bit of cranberry and a liberal amount of salt piled on bread….Mmmm. I just may have to do a little turkey on my upcoming days off.

Yesterday the day just dragged out mercilessly. I finally crept out to my car at around 11 and put the seat back to catch a cap nap, but I couldn’t get comfortable. I crawled in my small back seat and with bent knees I arranged myself in a somewhat sleepworthy position. There in the back seat a memory of a long ago time came back and I wasn’t expecting it. No one was more surprised that I was when the tears slid down……

When my brother and I were small, a Volkswagen bug was our family mode of transportation. The seat folded down in the back and we loved it. Back then there were no DVDs to watch, just the hum of the 1967 Bug. We were together and it was a good time. We watched cows drift by and slept on and off and played Slugbug.

It was the nostalgia of it all that brought forth tears, that, and realizing how much time has gone by and how fast. The sorrow we have both already lived through, the death of both our spouses, what are the odds of that? And I prayed for my brother right there in that back seat, because he needs a touch from the Lord right now.

Don’t we all?

I got through the day and realized I had to brave Wal-Mart and it was still Black Friday. I thought maybe it wouldn’t be too bad. It wasn’t, but I still couldn’t wait to get out of there. After that I stopped by Panda to get  Joyce some food and she informed me when I came in the door that she needed a map to the house. And that it was after 6:30. I didn’t want to ask what prompted the map thing. I think she was glad to see me though.

I made her plate and told her it was on the table, and because the house was sealed up like a tomb, I ran around opening windows. It was around 80 in the house. After dashing in and out with groceries, and working up a sweat, I noticed her fixing herself another plate. Then she struggled with the tea because we usually make it for her and set it by her plate. Finally she was settled at her place and I did my other jobs.

The cats were still safely inside and I was thankful. She let Briggs out one day and my cats never go out of the house. He was dirty and a bit scared I think, but he came running when Elaine called. So that was making me nervous all day. One hop over the fence and out in the road and they would be goners.

I thought for the thousandth time, how in the world Elaine has done this for two years. Only God’s grace is how.

I settled in front of the computer for a while, and talked to dear friends via FB. And talked to my Mom on the phone and Elaine from Las Vegas. I got some texts from Heather about Christmas plans.

And God touched down once again through His people. I am blessed.

 

A post about nothing

This is a post about nothing. Kind of like when you go to pray and you feel you have nothing to pray about and you end up pouring your heart out to God anyway. Even the picture has nothing to do with this nothing post, I just like it. I can do that because it’s my blog.

I am gradually switching over from my Blogger format to WordPress, and so far I like it. I don’t know what I am doing but I like it. No doubt it will change….right now it is not very fancy. There are no tabs at the top to describe anything. Eventually there will be an “About Me” tab and an “About This Blog” tab and maybe a few more.

There will also be buttons for Pinterest and Facebook and Twitter. Maybe I will even get really, really brave and do a Facebook Writer’s Page, but so far I haven’t given myself permission to call myself that yet.

I am working on it.

So please give me suggestions and ideas, and thank you in advance for being patient. Sometimes I would like to just scrawl on a piece of paper what I write and post it to Face book that way. Sometimes I get stray thoughts like: If John the Baptist had a blog what would it be like.

Out here on the edge of the desert, I feel him close somehow. There are places here that are lonely and desolate, and sometimes when I am hiking (watching out for rattlesnakes) I almost think I can hear his voice carried across the wind.

Warning the world. He must look different now in Heaven, not like a wildman wearing camel’s hair. But sometimes I would like to get a glimpse of the original version just for a moment.

The fever pitch of Christmas is upon us. Soon the Saguaros will be decked out with white lights, and I do love to see that. And the crazier everyone gets, the more I will want to slow down and make it last.

One moment at a time.

And be ye thankful…..

And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to the which also ye are called in one body; and be ye thankful……..

Today is a day to celebrate our blessings and lift our thanks to the Lord. Some of us will be gathered with loved ones around a beautiful table laden with all kinds of wonderful food. There will be laughter and noise and activity, and all the anticipation that accompanies a great meal. Others will be gathered where they really don’t want to be, eating someone else’s cooking when they would rather be eating their own. Let’s just be honest here.

I am very picky about my stuffing. I don’t want grey paste, I want something resembling the cornbread it once was, light and fluffy. And I don’t want giblets in it, thank you very much. And my turkey must be moist, not like the one in Christmas Vacation.

As much as we would all love to have that Norman Rockwell Thanksgiving Day, for most of us it won’t be a reality. And that’s okay. The thankfulness that beats in my heart today has nothing to do with a meal. It has to do with everything He has given me. Has given me, all my life.

I am spending the day at work because I opted for Christmas off.  

As much as I don’t want to admit it, there is always sadness attached to any holiday where I can’t have everyone I love in the same place at the same time. But there will be a dinner served here and I will enjoy it with some dear co-workers. All of us in the same boat. But all of us thankful.

My prayers will be with all those I love today. I pray that there will be peace and harmony and the Holy Spirit will do what He does best and bind together what has been broken in the past.

One thing that warms my heart today is that when my Mom was talking to my niece yesterday, she asked her what she remembers about Thanksgiving since she is not with them every year. I can see her expression and how she must have looked  when she said, “Eat…….” pause……and then she folded her hands and said thoughtfully,

“Pray” that’s when my heart seized up. She remembered.

Best answer she could have given.

Slowing Down

“Slow down. Take a deep breath. What’s the hurry? Why wear yourself out? Just what are you after anyway? But you say, ‘I can’t help it. I’m addicted to alien gods. I can’t quit.’ Jeremiah 2:25

Every year it happens. Either I am driving on the freeway or in a store and there will be a moment when I make a conscious decision not to join in the madness that seems to be picking up tempo all around me.

My heart beat slows…. I take a step back. It happened this past weekend when I was driving on the freeway and I had to slam on my brakes because people were driving even crazier than usual. I realized the fever pitch had started. Speed bump number one.

Then at the Mall, it happened again when I saw Santa’s Village already set up taking pictures of the kids. I don’t remember them starting that early last year. I saw Santa sprawled spread eagle in the chair looking bored to tears while the “elves” were like circus barkers trolling for customers. Really? I asked the same question I ask myself each year.

This is Christmas?  Speed bump number two.

And last night I had the mute button all ready for when the decibel level went through the roof on the commercials.

Don’t get me wrong, nobody loves Christmas more than I do. I totally get into decorating the house and doing the baking, and I do love to buy gifts, but I don’t go crazy.  And I will deck the halls and love every minute of it. There will be a tree in every room. In my bedroom, the tabletop Victorian, and in the office, the Southwestern tree. And Elaine has an ocean tree, decorated with while lights, mermaids, and shells. 

And in the kitchen, a tiny tree with plastic snowmen and snowflakes and other Christmasey type things. Have to be careful with that one, the lights are old and very hot and if it fell next to something flammable it would be a tiki torch in no time.

And then there is the main tree, which is a pre-lit 8 foot we found in a Costco return line one year….I am always amazed when the lights come back on each year. One year I threw my back out trying to stuff it back in the storage container. The first two sections were no problem, it was the last (fat) section that did it.

Never again will I try to do that alone.

Advent is coming…..I feel it in my heart. I am slowing down. I will make peace with whatever doesn’t get done. I will not succumb to the alien gods of commercialism run rampant. I will however, enjoy every little moment God gives me before the calendar turns over yet again.

It will be over all too soon.

The Soiled Dress

 

Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people. Ephesians 5:1-3

Thankful today, for another chance at clean…….Yesterday Pastor Kevin continued in his series of “Living Under the Influence” of Christ. Handing there on the large wooden cross in the center of the stage, there was a beautiful white wedding dress. As he talked, and with every example of how we flirt with living back in the world, he gave the dress another brown splotch from the bottle he held.

It hung there on that cross with ugly brown spots all over it and then we prayed, heads bowed, some going forward to kneel before that cross to get clean all over again.

I celebrate with Thanksgiving today, at another chance at clean. And better days. When you are depressed, and then you feel the sunlight seeping through your soul again it’s like a celebration of hope. Of Easter right in the middle of the week.

Another small miracle that tells us that whatever hardship or challenge we are going through now, that it won’t last forever.

Heaven however, is forever.

I ran this morning while night and day mingled together and for a short time, were one.

A few shy stars were out. The morning bird had not spoken yet, he was still sleepily blinking from his perch. The light from the sun was beginning to fill the sky and I realized that all over the world this pattern is repeated.

In nature, in hearts, in lives.

Thank you Lord, the new beginnings, and forgiveness…….

Counting my thanks……..Lifting depression…..conversations that bring about healing….good work function outing yesterday…..health that allows me to do physical exercise which always makes me feel better……laughter sprinkled throughout every day, however hopeless it seems…….beautiful weather…..more great memories of back home……a brave girl who broke through her fear and participated in her school parade…..simple joys of washing and a washer that works…….clean bedding…..friends and family who make this life worth living and God who makes everything possible. #945-957

Linking up here with Ann and below with Michelle today.

Thoughts on my week

And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. Philippians 4:8

My heart feels full right now.

I spent most of the week in the company of a very special person that I lost touch with for a very long time. I last knew her when she was a feisty little girl with a very strong mind and independent spirit who never stopped moving. She dropped out of our lives and maybe she would say, her own life too. We recently got in touch again after all these years. We made her a Birthday dinner and we all shed tears for the lost years together. She, her Mom, Elaine and myself.

We serve a God is in the business of restoration. He loves nothing better than happy endings. And getting people back together again that were always meant to be in our lives for good.

And those people in your life? They are there for a reason and a purpose, every single one!

I learned again this week that though life changes some things, some things never change. I smiled as I watched a beautiful young woman run into CVS pharmacy while we all stayed in the car because “it would take too much time to all get out.”

I smiled when she parked at the gas pump, blocking someone else in because she “would only be a minute”……smiled when I watched her moving to the music while she was paying for her item at the Quik Stop. I smiled because in so many ways, she is still so much that little girl.

Life has not been easy for any of us, we have all had our blows.

But none of them have been death blows. We are all still here. Still laughing, Still crying, but this time…..tears of joy.
We both laughed as she grabbed me for a hug and swung me around and around. Still so much that little girl, but now a confident beautiful woman all grown up, and in some ways, making up for lost years.

Aren’t we all?

The world is in trouble, of that I have no doubt. But in the world, there is still so much that is good. So many doing good things. A little at a time.

Also: Please take some time to read some of the posts from the Bloggers who went to Haiti this week with the HelpOneNow team here.

God’s little speed bumps

Sometimes God allows things……I call them God’s little speed bumps. I strained my back somehow, don’t even remember how I did it. It bothers me every now and then. I spent way too many years doing hard impact aerobics when I was young and now my body is punishing me. No running this week. Agendas and lists will be tossed aside while I heal.

This morning I got back in bed until the Aleve kicked in. I settled down to read and I thought that maybe this wasn’t such a bad thing.

I cleaned the kitty box looking much like a pregnant woman in her 8th month, knees apart, letting my quads do the work instead of my back. I noticed little things. The wind chimes, the lull of traffic, the sound of the litter hitting the side of the bag.

Time flows more slowly when you stop going from one thing to another without taking a breath in between.

Peace trickles in with the intentional movement of our actions, when we allow ourselves to consciously feel the rhythm of the day.

My mind, instead of racing ahead, relaxes into the rhythm to match my body. I am thankful that I am much better at this than when I was younger. Used to, I would rebel. Mentally I would kick and scream and insist on doing everything on my task list, my mind racing even as my body fought against it.

Nature calls, and right now the way I answer is the little corner of the yard where I sit. Wishing for pine trees and maples, the tossing of green okra leaves is as close as I get. They have yielded a good crop, they have done their job well. I watch the splash of green bending and twisting in the wind, and I am content.

Elaine’s school bus rumbles by at 7:27 AM, and again at 7:34. Once again I marvel at God……for giving her the route that comes right by the house. Out of all the possible routes to get, she got that one. It’s a God thing.

I am so grateful for that job, which has been a life-saver. She has seemed much like her old self again. Children have a way of breathing new life into weary souls. She comes home with a new story every day.

The Aleve has kicked in, and I feel better…..Yet I will continue to move slowly through this day. I will savor it, relaxing in God’s speed bump. Honoring Him with my tally of thanksgiving.

Count the gifts with me and the gratitude community, won’t you?


I revel in cooler temps…….the gifts of the garden……good bus route for Elaine……call from my Mom just now…….peace that comes when we pay attention to our bodies yield signs…….little furry creatures that enjoy it when you go back to bed…….coffee with frothe’……..shopping for a special birthday to come……thankfulness for all my blogger and online friends……the hope of the Lord which is my strength, always. #945-955

Gimme that old time religion

The last couple of weeks I have been picking a “blind pick” from my CD rack before I leave for my Saturday morning commute. I had to make Saturday somehow different, since it seems the whole world is off but me. (I know that’s not true) I picked one out but then I cheated and looked at it before I got in the car. I broke my own rule.

There was nothing wrong with my pick, it was good music, but this particular morning I needed more Jesus. I needed extra power. I needed a Holy Spirit infusion.

Raise the roof, clap your hands, sing at the top of your lungs praise is what I needed.

When I need that I go one of two places, Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir or the Gaithers. Well, make that three. I have to throw Sandy Patty in that line-up. This morning I chose the Gaithers. For all you “young un’s” out there, if you have never heard one of their Homecoming broadcasts, you have to give a listen. You will be lifted off your feet, and I promise you will have to lift at least one hand toward Heaven.

The first song on the CD was “We Shall Rise.” To my knowledge it was the only song I ever heard our Pastor at Temple Baptist Church request twice. We sang it one morning and I think it almost blew the top off the church. Instead of starting the announcements, Pastor Ken turned around and I can still see his shiny black suit and “brylcreemed hair” when he said, “I think we need to hear that one again.”

I started to sing this song on the way to work but I found I couldn’t squeak out a note. My throat closed up, and a fountain of tears threatened. As I listened to these grand old hymns of the faith, the remembering brought tears along with it.

I heard my other classmates sing, “Nothing but the Blood,” in that upstairs room where we held Children’s Church. I heard my Grandmother and her sisters voices. And I remembered when we would all get together as a family and sing hymns. I thought of how many aren’t there anymore, but with Jesus now singing with the angels.

I heard the swish of choir robes as we all filed out of the choir room. I remembered Easter’s and Christmases, and simpler times.

And Sunday lunch at Helwig’s and Chicken on a bun.

With one hand on the wheel and one hand toward the sky…….I could almost see those Pearly Gates swing wide open. I can’t remember when I had such an effortless commute. And as much as I love Christian contemporary, there is nothing wiggles quite like Southern Gospel.

And that’s saying a lot for this California grown yankee gal.