Dear readers, I treasure you…..I am taking a short blogging break. I will be back soon, I promise. Feel free to browse through the archives!

Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people. Ephesians 5:1-3

Thankful today, for another chance at clean…….Yesterday Pastor Kevin continued in his series of “Living Under the Influence” of Christ. Handing there on the large wooden cross in the center of the stage, there was a beautiful white wedding dress. As he talked, and with every example of how we flirt with living back in the world, he gave the dress another brown splotch from the bottle he held.

It hung there on that cross with ugly brown spots all over it and then we prayed, heads bowed, some going forward to kneel before that cross to get clean all over again.

I celebrate with Thanksgiving today, at another chance at clean. And better days. When you are depressed, and then you feel the sunlight seeping through your soul again it’s like a celebration of hope. Of Easter right in the middle of the week.

Another small miracle that tells us that whatever hardship or challenge we are going through now, that it won’t last forever.

Heaven however, is forever.

I ran this morning while night and day mingled together and for a short time, were one.

A few shy stars were out. The morning bird had not spoken yet, he was still sleepily blinking from his perch. The light from the sun was beginning to fill the sky and I realized that all over the world this pattern is repeated.

In nature, in hearts, in lives.

Thank you Lord, the new beginnings, and forgiveness…….

Counting my thanks……..Lifting depression…..conversations that bring about healing….good work function outing yesterday…..health that allows me to do physical exercise which always makes me feel better……laughter sprinkled throughout every day, however hopeless it seems…….beautiful weather…..more great memories of back home……a brave girl who broke through her fear and participated in her school parade…..simple joys of washing and a washer that works…….clean bedding…..friends and family who make this life worth living and God who makes everything possible. #945-957

Linking up here with Ann and below with Michelle today.

My heart feels full right now.

I spent most of the week in the company of a very special person that I lost touch with for a very long time. I last knew her when she was a feisty little girl with a very strong mind and independent spirit who never stopped moving. She dropped out of our lives and maybe she would say, her own life too. We recently got in touch again after all these years. We made her a Birthday dinner and we all shed tears for the lost years together. She, her Mom, Elaine and myself.

We serve a God is in the business of restoration. He loves nothing better than happy endings. And getting people back together again that were always meant to be in our lives for good.

And those people in your life? They are there for a reason and a purpose, every single one!

I learned again this week that though life changes some things, some things never change. I smiled as I watched a beautiful young woman run into CVS pharmacy while we all stayed in the car because “it would take too much time to all get out.”

I smiled when she parked at the gas pump, blocking someone else in because she “would only be a minute”……smiled when I watched her moving to the music while she was paying for her item at the Quik Stop. I smiled because in so many ways, she is still so much that little girl.

Life has not been easy for any of us, we have all had our blows.

But none of them have been death blows. We are all still here. Still laughing, Still crying, but this time…..tears of joy.
We both laughed as she grabbed me for a hug and swung me around and around. Still so much that little girl, but now a confident beautiful woman all grown up, and in some ways, making up for lost years.

Aren’t we all?

The world is in trouble, of that I have no doubt. But in the world, there is still so much that is good. So many doing good things. A little at a time.

Also: Please take some time to read some of the posts from the Bloggers who went to Haiti this week with the HelpOneNow team here.

Sometimes God allows things……I call them God’s little speed bumps. I strained my back somehow, don’t even remember how I did it. It bothers me every now and then. I spent way too many years doing hard impact aerobics when I was young and now my body is punishing me. No running this week. Agendas and lists will be tossed aside while I heal.

This morning I got back in bed until the Aleve kicked in. I settled down to read and I thought that maybe this wasn’t such a bad thing.

I cleaned the kitty box looking much like a pregnant woman in her 8th month, knees apart, letting my quads do the work instead of my back. I noticed little things. The wind chimes, the lull of traffic, the sound of the litter hitting the side of the bag.

Time flows more slowly when you stop going from one thing to another without taking a breath in between.

Peace trickles in with the intentional movement of our actions, when we allow ourselves to consciously feel the rhythm of the day.

My mind, instead of racing ahead, relaxes into the rhythm to match my body. I am thankful that I am much better at this than when I was younger. Used to, I would rebel. Mentally I would kick and scream and insist on doing everything on my task list, my mind racing even as my body fought against it.

Nature calls, and right now the way I answer is the little corner of the yard where I sit. Wishing for pine trees and maples, the tossing of green okra leaves is as close as I get. They have yielded a good crop, they have done their job well. I watch the splash of green bending and twisting in the wind, and I am content.

Elaine’s school bus rumbles by at 7:27 AM, and again at 7:34. Once again I marvel at God……for giving her the route that comes right by the house. Out of all the possible routes to get, she got that one. It’s a God thing.

I am so grateful for that job, which has been a life-saver. She has seemed much like her old self again. Children have a way of breathing new life into weary souls. She comes home with a new story every day.

The Aleve has kicked in, and I feel better…..Yet I will continue to move slowly through this day. I will savor it, relaxing in God’s speed bump. Honoring Him with my tally of thanksgiving.

Count the gifts with me and the gratitude community, won’t you?

The last couple of weeks I have been picking a “blind pick” from my CD rack before I leave for my Saturday morning commute. I had to make Saturday somehow different, since it seems the whole world is off but me. (I know that’s not true) I picked one out but then I cheated and looked at it before I got in the car. I broke my own rule.

There was nothing wrong with my pick, it was good music, but this particular morning I needed more Jesus. I needed extra power. I needed a Holy Spirit infusion.

Raise the roof, clap your hands, sing at the top of your lungs praise is what I needed.

When I need that I go one of two places, Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir or the Gaithers. Well, make that three. I have to throw Sandy Patty in that line-up. This morning I chose the Gaithers. For all you “young un’s” out there, if you have never heard one of their Homecoming broadcasts, you have to give a listen. You will be lifted off your feet, and I promise you will have to lift at least one hand toward Heaven.

The first song on the CD was “We Shall Rise.” To my knowledge it was the only song I ever heard our Pastor at Temple Baptist Church request twice. We sang it one morning and I think it almost blew the top off the church. Instead of starting the announcements, Pastor Ken turned around and I can still see his shiny black suit and “brylcreemed hair” when he said, “I think we need to hear that one again.”

I started to sing this song on the way to work but I found I couldn’t squeak out a note. My throat closed up, and a fountain of tears threatened. As I listened to these grand old hymns of the faith, the remembering brought tears along with it.

I heard my other classmates sing, “Nothing but the Blood,” in that upstairs room where we held Children’s Church. I heard my Grandmother and her sisters voices. And I remembered when we would all get together as a family and sing hymns. I thought of how many aren’t there anymore, but with Jesus now singing with the angels.

I heard the swish of choir robes as we all filed out of the choir room. I remembered Easter’s and Christmases, and simpler times.

And Sunday lunch at Helwig’s and Chicken on a bun.

With one hand on the wheel and one hand toward the sky…….I could almost see those Pearly Gates swing wide open. I can’t remember when I had such an effortless commute. And as much as I love Christian contemporary, there is nothing wiggles quite like Southern Gospel.

And that’s saying a lot for this California grown yankee gal.

I knelt by my bed, seeking the familiar, looking for home.

Lately, easy things have been difficult and I slog through the day, feeling like I am beating a path through a thick jungle with a machete.

I cherish my days away from work, I count them off, savor every hour. Four, three, two, and now I have just tomorrow. Herding cats would be easier than trying to capture my thoughts right now.  I ache for the simple. I ache for things to slow down.

I hunger for nature even more than food. I need to hear the trees speak, hear my own heartbeat and feel it slow to the rhythm of the bigger picture. But trips are like a far off dream, and the motor home sits silent and empty on the storage lot.

Care giving takes its toll, and the rubber is meeting the road again. And I know it is no accident that other circumstances have come into play, all of them conspiring to create the “perfect storm.” My job is stressing me out big time, and I am in the beginning stages of that time in a woman’s life known as “The Change” BIG LETTERS.

It goes by many names, and no one wants to talk about it so I won’t either. Suffice it to say, it feels like a black shade has been pulled down on my life.

And yet, even with all this going against me, I know this season of my life is an opportunity. A divine appointment. A chance to demonstrate love without getting anything in return. A chance to put my faith into action.

Care giving is extremely humbling simply because of the times you fail. Day after day we are tested. Day after day there are opportunities to succeed or fail at loving.

Just the other morning the clouds parted and God allowed me to feel a tremendous sense of peace, even joy about what we have been doing for the last year and a half……I was pumped up, I was ready to deliver a sermon on the Beatitudes to anyone who would listen.

And 10 minutes later her Mom got up and irritated me to the point that I retorted back to the sarcastic thing she said. Most of what she says is sarcastic but I know that. I should have been ready. And of course her timing is always impeccable.

How can a woman who can’t remember anything you said 3 minutes ago, remember you hitting a pole with the car and doesn’t hesitate reminding anyone who will listen? I guess when you have practiced negativity and denial your whole life, it comes easy, that’s how.

I really don’t know how Elaine does it, and yet I do.

We laughed when she got up and I told her how fired up I was, how I wanted to preach a sermon and then Joyce immediately showed me how far I still was from the Kingdom of God.

I am happy to say that through all this, we have kept our gratitude. Our peace. And in spite of it all, there are a hundred little moments a day where I will absurd moments of joy.

At the library……out by the garden…..sharing a laugh……kneading bread dough…..watching the cats antics.

And getting into the Word can always take me home when I don’t feel I can take another moment.

I can honestly answer the question that Paul Chan throws out in his book, “Crazy Love.” What are you doing right now that requires faith?

Everything, simply everything.

“If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you?  Even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you?  Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked.  Be merciful,  just as your Father is merciful.  Luke 6:32-36

I always thank my God as I remember you in my prayers, because I hear about your love for all his holy people and your faith in the Lord Jesus. I pray that your partnership with us in the faith may be effective in deepening your understanding of every good thing we share for the sake of Christ. Your love has given me great joy and encouragement, because you, brother, have refreshed the hearts of the Lord’s people. Philemon 1:4-7

I had another post in mind but when I saw Duane Scott’s topic I decided to chime in with  my two cents worth and answer the question he put forth. Let me give a wholehearted emphatical “Yes” to the question of whether online friendships are real.

When I entered the blogging world way back in 2009 I had no idea where it would lead. But God gave me a wonderful surprise. Along this journey, I have read heartfelt words full of laughter, tears and emotions that have moved me greatly. And as it turns out these were all attached to people. Real live living people.

And I have become very attached to some of you. In fact, I sincerely hope we are friends because that is how I think of you.  And even though we have never met? You are almost as real to me as someone dear I can touch and feel each day.

Along the way, you became real to me. Your words touched me, became a part of the fabric of my life.

Each day I know you a little bit more, and I hope you know me better too. Because in this journey toward Heaven, we are starting our eternal friendships right here…..

Right now.

You have become my prayer partners and I hope you know that in my little place of prayer at first light, when your name crosses my heart I pray for you, and I think about your life and the people in it.

I could call you all by name but you know who you are, and I don’t want to leave anyone out!

I know there should be a disclaimer now, we have all heard the stories. Someone masquerades on Facebook as someone else with someone else’s picture…..people are hurt, lives and relationships are destroyed, and I guess that is real too.

But that’s not you.

Today as I walked down the pathway that led to work, I smiled as I passed by the spot where about  two months ago I actually talked to Duane Scott on the phone for the first time. He became more than beautiful words on a page as we talked and laughed about writing, and life, and my ineptitude on the computer.

He became a real person, and because of that conversation, that little place beside the walkway has permanantly changed for me, it has become a good memory. And it all started online.  

I remember how ill at ease and self concious I felt about calling, because I have really never escaped my shyness about meeting new people, but I smile when I remember how his friendliness and kindness put me at ease.

Online friendships I don’t know about, but online friends? They are real, and I treasure every one of you.

Still have not started my WordPress blog. I am still on Blogger, but someday you will come here and find a brand shiny new blog. Just not yet….