This’n’that

How to stay young at heart…..



Willow tree angel of the heart
Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it…….Proverbs 4:23
My best friend Elaine and I recently re-connected with some dear people who were some of the first that we met when we came to Arizona years ago. Ruby sold Mary Kay and I ran out of lipstick! We had an instant connection cemented by lots of laughter. I don’t know why we lost touch, and it doesn’t really matter. Life has a way of carrying people in different directions sometimes, but I always believe that God loves to orchestrate reunions too. What a blessing it was to find that none of us had changed much, and our hearts had not changed at all! It seemed to me like the last 8-9 years had dissolved and that we were all standing in the same spot we were when last we met.
Isn’t it a blessing to have friends like that? Ron and Ruby will be the first to tell you that “old age ain’t for sissies.” They have had their share of health problems and surgeries, but they have retained the secret of youth. Laughter, their love for the Lord and each other, staying in the Word, (both are leading Bible studies), keeping up on current events, watching the Pastor’s  four children and learning new things. Most importantly they have not forgotten how to laugh at themselves! They don’t allow their own problems to consume them, but realize the importance of listening to others concerns and joys.
Their home is strewn with signs of life, children’s toys, open Bibles on the table, books with markers in them, paintings and new photos on the walls and cookies in the jar. Even though they are in their seventies and probably have many aches and pains, they dress sharp and they stay positive. They know the Source of hope! Theirs is a home full of life, a house of hope. A place where you want to take off your shoes and stay awhile. They have figured out the secret of staying young at heart. We all know youth won’t last, but our hearts can stay young forever. That is something we have control over!
Have you ever visited a home and a people that have given up? You can’t wait to get out the door!
What a blessing it is to re-connect with old friends, and what a blessing to find that all the important things have not changed; for it is the Spirit of God that draws us together. No matter what our age, background, cultural differences, the Spirit of love binds our hearts and dissolves the differences that the world wants to put between us so many times. We have become a society that seeks to separate…..Sometimes we separate ourselves, and that is never good. There is so much we can all learn from each other at every age!
Thank you God for bringing us back together with our special friends at just the right time……….and thank you for the magic of laughter, which came just as easy as it ever did to us all, even after years apart, what a blessing!
So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Philippians 2:1,2

“You will not find a soul mate in the quiet of your room. You must go to a noisy place and look in the quiet corners.” Robert Brault

When you know you shouldn’t

“Chuckles the clown bites the dust” courtesy of Google

There are few things in life more uncomfortable than being in a place where you know you shouldn’t laugh but you cave in under the excruciating pressure due to circumstances beyond your control. You feel it building inside you like a dam ready to burst forth, and worse, you are with someone whom you know beyond a shadow of a doubt feels the exact same way you do. You are both losing an impossible battle.

Under most circumstances laughing at a funeral would be totally inappropriate. However, certain events I have heard about would render it almost impossible not to. Those who remember the Mary Tyler Moore episode where Chuckles the Clown expires portray perfectly that particular kind of agony. Throughout the show Mary is astounded and disgusted with her co-worker’s insensitivity for making all kinds of jokes at Chuckles’ expense, however, when the priest starts the eulogy describing all of Chuckles the Clown’s characters, she loses it. The resulting show was one of the most highly rated, most famous and in my view most hysterical episodes ever.

There are a few moments I have heard about in my family and among friends where I can only thank God that I was not there. I’m sure I would not have been able to handle the pressure. In both cases, each were wonderful people who no doubt would have seen the humor in it.

“It was a dark and stormy night…..” sounds like something straight out of a Hitchcock movie, but it describes my Great-grandmother’s funeral. My Mom and Dad went to the funeral home to meet with the director who was right out of Central Casting, complete with ill-fitting black suit and dandruff like snow-drifts on his shoulders, and whiskey breath. They were led down catacombs of hallway to a stuffy back room where they sat and went over the service with Mr.Dandruff and his assistant. As lightning flickered the already dim lights, and thunder crashed outside, all they kept hearing was, “Don’t worry, everything is paid for!” They should have worried.

The funeral was held in a very old building on Pine Street that could have been a stand-in for the Bates Motel or a sanitarium. Flower arrangements were plastic, and very faded. The only saving grace was that a very nice minister showed up and did a wonderful eulogy. If he hadn’t they would have had Mr.Whiskey breath. By then, however, it was too late, the damage had already been done by a trio of singers. They lost control when the warm up started, which everyone in the service could hear. No amount of warming-up could have helped them. Now, my Dad had specified “no singers” but some well wishers no doubt wanted to make a contribution to honor my Great-grandmother. Whoever told them they could sing was badly mistaken.

After the very nice Pastor was done, they gave a huge sigh of relief, thinking it was all over, however, the singers were not done and they proceeded to start warming up again. Mom and Dad were front and center and in full view of everyone. The bench was shaking so hard from them trying to stifle their laughter that the faded pot of flowers threatened to topple over, and my Mom bit the side of her mouth until it bled. She says it was excruciating.

I also knew someone pulling a casket with a team of horses, when they hit a bump and the casket slid out of the wagon and the body came out. They were so mortified they kept right on driving! Tragic, no doubt, for the horrified onlookers and family members who hopefully were waiting somewhere out of sight of the carriage.

The last instance was a couple days ago. My Mom had an elderly friend who had survived the death of a husband and two grown sons before she passed on herself. She was known for telling jokes to anyone and everyone who would listen. She loved God and was a blessing to all who knew her. Even lying in the stretcher on the way to the hospital she told a joke to the paramedic. That was just how she was. My Mom attended the service with a friend of ours who also has a very healthy if slightly bent sense of humor. Everything was going along fine, again, until the singing started. They handed out the words to every song which made it worse, they knew just how many excruciating verses were left to be mangled. They were trying to harmonize, but as my friend said, “They should have stuck to the melody and gotten that right.”

Bless their hearts, I am sure they meant well.

As for Doris, she is now telling her jokes to the Angels in Heaven, finally home with her loved ones once more……

Even in laughter the heart may ache, and the end of joy may be grief. Proverbs 14:13

Disclaimer: I know there are certain instances where laughter is never appropriate, but I think that life is tough and we need to find humor in situations whenever possible. It is how I have gotten through my own grief. I sincerely hope I didn’t offend anyone with the subject matter. Lori

Meeting God in the Stall

Sometimes the most important thing in a whole day is the rest we take between two deep breaths.  ~Etty Hillesum

Sometimes you just need to get away, immediately…….I had one such moment this morning. I call it a time-out in the stall. It happens every now and then at work. I’ll be cruising along multitasking and answering phones and I feel pressure under the surface, but nothing insurmountable. Then one seemingly small insignificant thing happens and I become overwhelmed by an avalanche of emotion. It’s as if emotions I had been stuffing down for the past week or two, rise to the surface and I realize that I simply cannot answer one more phone call or take one more request at that moment. The small thing that happens usually doesn’t have anything at all to do with what I’m feeling, but it’s enough to make me realize that something is wrong and I need to……STOP immediately……and PRAY.

You Moms (or Dads) raising young kids or teenagers can probably relate to this at home all day. You dream of escape, for just one moment of silence, peace. Of experiencing the unbelievable luxury of being able to lock yourself in without someone banging on the door.

Long ago when I used to go to my Aunt and Uncle’s to stay, my cousins would invariably play one of their favorite tricks on my Aunt. One of them was rigging up her cigarettes with explosives. Awful kids that we were, we would wait until she took her morning break in the bathroom, and then wait by the closed door until we heard the hiss of the match on those Lucky Strikes she always smoked….then, BAM! We would laugh uproariously and wait for the the expletive that usually came after. She never did kill us for that, though she always threatened to. She was truly a saint…..She had five kids, lived with an alcoholic husband for many years, and was always upbeat and good for a laugh, even if it was at her expense.  She needed alone time in the bathroom more than anyone.

Sometimes we all do……

This morning, He met me in the stall once again. I ran in, closed my eyes, took a deep breath and prayed. I felt better…….I’m glad there is no place where He is unwilling to answer when I call.

Before they call I will answer; while they are still speaking I will hear. Isaiah 65:24

What do you do to give yourself a timeout during the day, anyone?

Where do you buy books?

Tom’s Used Books, Lodi California

Over at Internet Monk there was an interesting post about Christian Bookstores and this got me to thinking about bookstores in general, which is one of my favorite topics anyway. Bookstores are my all time favorite  hangouts. Recently I have re-discovered used bookstores. I love them! Some of them are musty, dusty, and cramped, and they sometimes have books piled on the floor. The reason I like them is that their inventory is always changing, you never really know what you are going to find, it’s a bit like a treasure hunt. When I go back home I go to Tom’s Used Books. He has been on School Street for about 25 years. There are usually a couple of cats roaming or laying around by the cash register, and the aisles are very narrow, and part of the floor feels like it’s sinking. I love it.

I can disappear for hours in the aisles of a bookstore. It is my happy place. I frequent the big guys, Barnes and Noble and Borders, but I love the independant bookstores that I feel are such an important part of our community. Many of  these are going away, regrettably, although there are a few still around if you look hard enough. One of my favorite movie bookstores is the one from “You’ve Got Mail.” If I had a fantasy job I would own that bookstore!

I have a dream of owning my own used bookstore. Everyone tells me this is a bad idea….not in this economy they say,  it would never work, what with Amazon and online sales, not to mention Kindle and Nook.(Of course I would have online sales in my store, too!) Anyway, it’s a dream I can’t escape. I frequently go there in my mind.
 It would be a little storefront building downtown within walking distance to everything. A little cottage would do nicely also. I already have a name picked out which I will not disclose here in case I actually do this someday…..I would sell used books with a Christian bent and also the classics, poetry, nature books, books on animals, children’s books and mysteries. It would be my store and I would market and sell what I want, not what someone else tells me I must sell. I would also sell coffees, teas, and have comfy chairs and little tables by the window for reading, sipping and dreaming. And lamps that cast warm light.
I would host a weekly Bible study that people could sign up for…..I might sell a few trinkets along with the coffee and tea but not many, and of course homemade cookies, muffins and scones. I would link up with local food banks and churches to let people know how they could help out in their community. I would sell books that instruct, edify, uplift, inspire and encourage. I do like happy endings, and I don’t apologize for it. I realize that in life many times there are no happy endings, that is why I like books that make me feel good at the end. 
I would have music, maybe some jazz or classical quietly in the background. At Christmas I would play the songs you don’t hear too often anymore…..”It Came Upon the Midnight Clear,” and “O Come, O Come Emmanuel.” It would be a peaceful place, a quiet escape from the noisy world around us that never ceases to clamor for our attention. A small stopping point in your day, a little cozy corner where you could come visit with your neighbor and pet a cat….yes, cats are a must have for my shop.
What do you think, would you come to my shop?
I am a bit afraid for the future of bookstores. I have shopped Amazon, I know it’s convenient and fast and easy, but it will never take the place of the little bookstore downtown where you can browse your Saturday away thinking of things you should be doing but putting off for just a while longer…….
What about you? Where do you buy books? What is your favorite bookstore hangout?
****Lolita disclaimer: I know this is primarily a Christian blog, but I noticed the copy of Lolita too late and didn’t have time to photoshop a Bible in place of it. It is the only picture of Tom’s I could find on the web! Thank you for having a sense of humor……

Watching the Sky

By Maxfield Parrish

“Seek him that maketh the seven stars and Orion, and turneth the shadow of death into the morning, and maketh the day dark with night: that calleth for the waters of the sea, and poureth them out upon the face of the earth: The LORD is his name:” Amos 5:8

Last night I stepped outside and was greeted with a “Maxfield Parrish” sky. Ever since I saw some of his art long ago, I think of him when the sky is that certain shade of inky blue…..that not quite dark cobalt, still lit from underneath by the sun’s last trace of light. I took a deep breath, thanking God for the night sky, His sky…..for the stars, the moon and placing me here at just this moment in time.

I always make it a point to go out at dusk and look for the moonrise. God’s mysterious night light. I love that particular time of the evening. There is a resigned peacefulness in the twilight when the evening sounds start to rise and everything calms down. Once again, stars appear just like they did the night before, there is security in that.The evening bird closes out the day and ushers in the night with one last song…….This one day has closed out….. and we did the best we could with it, and it is enough.

The other night it was a harvest moon. As I saw the glow of it rising over the Superstition mountain ridge, it almost took my breath away…it was huge and otherworldly, like it was too big for the horizon. I was in the car and I wanted to pull over so I could watch the whole performance, but I had to be content with watching it the best I could while driving down the freeway.

In ancient Israel it was common for people to sleep on the rooftops. Maybe because it was cooler outside, and probably there was more room. They spent a lot of time watching the sky……watching, and waiting too. For a Messiah that would be preceded by a strange star…..If there was some new star there they would have known it immediately.

They read the book of Numbers, they had read the Prophecy
“I see him, but not now; I behold him, but not near. A star will come out of Jacob; a scepter will rise out of Israel…….Numbers 24:17
 
I don’t know who taught me to be a sky watcher and I’m not sure when it started…..



When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and stars, which you have ordained; what is man that You take thought of him, and the son of man that You care for him? Yet You have made him a little lower than God, and You crown him with glory and majesty! Psalm 8:3-5

Now my brother is teaching my Niece to watch the sky too, I think it’s great. Every evening they are together they go out and look for the moon……and everytime the moon is a very small crescent, my Mom thinks of me from California.


Jesus, the original people person

 “Yet the news about him spread all the more, so that crowds of people came to hear him and to be healed of their sicknesses. But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.” Luke 5: 15,16
Crowds followed Jesus everywhere He went. He was the original people person. He wasn’t a people pleaser though. He wasn’t afraid to say what was unpopular, but He didn’t grandstand. He didn’t bring up controversial subjects to draw attention to Himself, although controversy followed Him because He spoke the truth, and the truth wasn’t always what they wanted to hear. But He always spoke the truth in perfect love. 
Jesus always had time for people. Maybe you feel as if you are in demand now, from your work, your friends, your family? Just try producing a few miracles and see how in demand you would feel then….remember the Calgon commercial? Take me away……..I think Jesus must have felt like that because the Bible says He went often to lonely places to pray. 
People like people who are people persons, not people who are people pleasers. With people pleasers you never really know if they are just giving you lip service. If they are really going to follow through. Do they mean what they say or are they just saying what you want to hear? This is just my humble opinion, mind you. I can say this because I have been a people pleaser at times, and I don’t like that about myself. I want to be more like Jesus and be a people person.
Ever been to a funeral and everyone gets up to speak and says how so and so “always had time for me.” We all know those special people who, no matter what is going on in their lives, they always treat you as if you are the most important person at that moment. They don’t look away, distracted by every little thing when you are pouring your heart out to them. I once knew a very special Pastor like that. People would line up out the door just to hug him. He always had time. He looked in your eyes and made you feel like you mattered….like he was so glad you waited so he could see you!
That is how Jesus was. I want to be more like that. It doesn’t come naturally for me. I think I would have been well suited to the cloister with a stack of books. But God wants us to invest in the lives of people. When I go to Heaven He will not ask me how many books I read. Darn.
When I look at Jesus, I see how far I have to go…….but He is happy when I try. He is happy when He nudges me and I pay attention.
Okay I am closing my book now……
 “One day as Jesus was standing by the Lake of Gennesaret,  with the people crowding around him and listening to the word of God, he saw at the water’s edge two boats, left there by the fishermen, who were washing their nets. He got into one of the boats, the one belonging to Simon, and asked him to put out a little from shore. Then he sat down and taught the people from the boat.” Luke 5:1-3

Reflections on blogging

Adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

I am constantly amazed at all the creative and inspiring blogs there are out there. They are as varied and diverse as the people who have created them. I have some favorites listed on my blog roll, and they all have favorites listed on theirs as well, it goes on and on. I know there are hundreds out there that I have missed…..I know they are out there! Each one represents a life, and other lives attached to it. This is a community. You could even say it is like church. The church started out as a fellowship of believers, gathering together to worship, pray for each other’s needs, and then going out into the community to serve others….Hey, sounds a bit like blogging to me!
I really love this blogging thing! I can honestly say it has enriched my faith, my life.  I pray for each follower on my blog because I know that they are not there by accident. God sent them! I realize with every face I see there are needs, heartaches, joys and sorrows. I pray that God might use me to give out the same inspiration, comfort and encouragement that they give me along the way!
So much life leaps off the pages of so many, all these thoughts, prayers going back and forth, all this building each other up is very good.  Not only that, it is Biblical……”Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” 1 Thessalonians 5:11
In so doing we are opening doors, inviting others in that may never have had an invitation otherwise. And the circle is growing……”Every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. They broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising God and enjoying the favor of all the people. And the Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.” Acts 2:46,47
Each day they continued to meet together at home offices, at desks, steaming cups in hand, birdsong drifting through the windows, at kitchen tables, at Starbucks, Panera………breaking bread and building each other up.

Cure for Anxiety

I love to think of nature as an unlimited broadcasting station, through which God speaks to us every hour, if we will only tune in. ~George Washington Carver
Ever feel like your mind won’t stop fluttering? My friend has another word for it, she calls it “Zingin” You can’t put the “g” on the end either, it just doesn’t sound right. When she says, “I’m zingin” I know exactly what she means. Now I am starting to say it. Today my mind has felt like a hundred butterfies with their wings fluttering all at once. I don’t even know why. Some days are just like that.
I am looking for that quiet corner in my mind today and so far it has escaped me. Over at the Moonboat Cafe I learned about a new form of Japanese poetry called Gogyohka. I hope you hop over there and see what it’s all about, and enjoy Cassandra’s post while you are at it.  You will be inspired and refreshed!
In the meantime, I thought I would try my hand at it. It is amazing that my mind actually did quiet down a bit after I tried it!
Though my mind seems filled
with a hundred tiny butterflies
if I focus on only one
slowly resting on a flower
I am at peace
Dear friend,
You aren’t the only one to be distracted from the presence of God; I understand completely. Our minds are so flighty. But remember that our God-given will governs all of our strength. It must recall the mind to God. Otherwise, our spirit may wander, dragging us down to the things of this earth.
Brother Lawrence

Thank the hero in your life today…..

We all know them, they live in our neighborhoods, we see them in our children’s schools, we have known them throughout our lives, people who sacrificially go above and beyond the call. We marvel at how they can do the things they do, how they can sacrifice so much. We think of them as everyday heroes. Maybe you are one of them……The thing about these people that defines them so wonderfully is that they don’t think of themselves as heroes at all. They see a need, sometimes a big one, and they step in to fill it. They don’t sit and think about how it might affect them, how much they might have to sacrifice. They don’t ponder, procrastinate, wonder if God wants them to do it, they just do it.
What got me started about all this is that I was thinking of my folks neighbors. They learned that their boss was going to institutionalize their severely handicapped son and they did the unthinkable and volunteered to take him into their home……as their own son. When I am home visiting I see the bus pull up with him in it, a full grown man now. They must care for his every need. This means diapers, feeding, lifting. And yet they do it joyfully.
You never know what someone is going through at any given moment, what burdens they carry. Still they keep on. Maybe they have three jobs but they still go out of their way to help others. I bet we can count off ten people we know right now that do amazing things on a day to day basis. I know two people who take service animals to rest homes and hospitals. Imagine the smiles they are greeted with, shaking hands that reach out, remembering better days.
Let the everyday heroes in your life know that you have noticed! Smile at the woman emptying the trash cans at work, the man trimming the trees, your waitress who looks burdened. Everyday there are people rising out of bed early and instead of spending their golden years at leisure, devoting the rest of their days in service to others, standing in the gap for someone. Doing the work of God.
Maybe they don’t even know God, but they are doing His work just the same.
And think about this. Think about all the many issues that divide churches today, divide the world really. This is one thing we can all agree on. Helping one another, serving the poor, the needy, the widow, the orphans among us is right and everyone knows it.
If we could all unite on this one point, forget about the other stuff that doesn’t really matter, just do this one thing, think how the world could change. “But avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and arguments and quarrels about the law, because these are unprofitable and useless.” Titus 3:9

Lord, today I pray for all these heroes today, and especially on my heart are our soldiers coming home, many of them with life-changing injuries having to go through many months and years of therapy. May there be loving hands to help them, support them, love them, and visit them in their times of loneliness. May they find peace and comfort in Your Spirit, Amen.
“This is a trustworthy saying. And I want you to stress these things, so that those who have trusted in God may be careful to devote themselves to doing what is good. These things are excellent and profitable for everyone.” Titus 3:8

Grandma’s House

501 South Lee……

I got a text from my brother last night, it said: “Did you see my email about Grandma’s house?” I knew immediately that it was up for sale. Last time I was back home it looked just like this picture, pretty rough around the edges.

I always nursed the hidden whisper of a thought close to my heart that when this house went up for sale, it would be my sign to move back to California. I always had a dream to move back in and make it look just like when my Grandpa was alive……You see, when he died of cancer, my Grandmother pulled out every tree, starting with the tree roses that lined the driveway. It must have been her own way of grieving……Imagine two beautiful silver furs nestled in perfect green lawn, tree roses in every color marching along the driveway to the right, and a full garden in back, complete with grape trellis and two cherry trees. And there were always morning glories and hydrangeas.

My brother still calls it Grandma’s house too. He remembers spending time in that yard with Grandpa. So many memories attached to this place……. All the family dinners we had there!  The voices roll through my mind like waves when I see these pictures….This was my other home, my second safe place, a place where I was always welcome, secure.

When my Grandmother went to the nursing home, it impacted me greatly, more than I probably knew at the time. I was twenty one and I had taken the reigns of my life back from God and was failing miserably. In the throes of anorexia, I would walk and walk and no one knew where I went. It was here that I came. My Grandmother was no longer there, but all her stuff still was. I would let myself in the door and surround myself with her. We all dealt with our loss differently I guess. I stuffed mine down deep inside.

God knows all about loss…….But I never gave Him the chance to bring me through that one. If I had, He could have taught me how to bring that loss to Him and be healed.  Instead, I left Him outside and tried to deal with things alone, which never works.

As Robert Frost said, “way leads on to way…….”life does that.

I can see my books resting on these shelves, can’t believe they didn’t paint over the knotty pine!

Circumstances being what they are, I can’t buy the house. I shed a few tears this morning, letting something go that never really was mine anyway, and it’s okay. I can give this to God too. It was fun to think about when it wasn’t a reality. Now that the reality is here, I know that the timing is not right. If that was where God wanted me, I would be there now. I have learned one thing in life and that is this: home is ultimately where He is, and He is everywhere I go.

I am glad for one thing, whoever owned it must have loved it. Though the outside looks rough, the inside has been taken care of. They even kept my Grandmother’s old stove. I will pray that whoever buys it will keep loving it and senses that once upon a time, love rested there.

Grandma’s kitchen where she used to make her homemade kuchen.

What about you, ever had an emotional attachment to a place? Do you now? I would love to hear about it.

“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”  Matthew 6:33