Thankful for another Birthday!


Lord, I stand before you today so very grateful to have had fifty one years of life. I think of all You have brought me through and I can only stand in awe of how You have loved me. It brings me to tears in quiet times of contemplation when I think of the many times I have turned away from You…..

You remained steadfast, and knew that I would come back. How can I contemplate such a love? A love that does not move, does not budge even with all the meanderings of my heart.

With every passing year, I pray that I bring you more and more of myself and cling to less of everything else.

Lord Jesus, we are silly sheep who have dared stand before You and try to bribe You with our preposterous portfolios. Suddenly we have come to our senses. We are sorry and ask You to forgive us. Give us the grace to admit we are ragamuffins, to embrace our brokenness, to celebrate Your mercy when we are at our weakest, to rely on Your mercy no matter what we may do.

Dear Jesus, gift us to stop grandstanding and trying to get attention, to do the truth quietly without display, to let the dishonesties in our lives fade away, to accept our limitations, to cling to the gospel of grace, and to delight in Your love. Amen
Brennan Manning “The Ragamuffin Gospel

Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Colossians 3:15

Making peace with my spots

My Mom and her dear friend Pat were conversing over coffee, when something in the conversation prompted Pat to say, “I have never liked myself.” She said it softly, looking down at the table. I must preface this to say that Pat is one of the most giving, loving people that I have ever met. When Pat says “I will pray for you,” it is no trite statement, she says it from the depths of her innermost being.

My Mom had her Bible on the table, so she opened it to Psalm 139 and started reading aloud. Then she got to this part:
For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.
Psalm 139: 13-16

Great tears slid down her cheeks, for she was convicted. Pat loves God with a depth that knows no bounds. When she read those lines she knew that she had failed Him and it crushed her.

Since that day her whole countenance has changed. She feels differently about herself now and it shows. Even her daughter noticed the difference! Now she is sharing the message with others. Her new found freedom is infectious. Her enthusiasm has infected me to pass it along…..and learn.

So today I am taking a lesson from Pat, and my Mom. I have never liked my skin. It has given me problems since I was twelve years old. Severe acne plagued me up until such time as they invented Accutane. That drug was a miracle for me….I also have large pores and freckles. I have always coveted beautiful skin. You know the kind, no pores at all, looks like porcelain. My dear friend always leads me around the cosmetics section at Dillard’s and Macy’s. She knows how I feel.

I am making peace with my “spots” as they call them in the UK. All of them. Instead of saying or thinking, “I hate my spots,” I am going to say, “I am fearfully and wonderfully made, and my skin has made me the person I am today.”

God created my spots, and He created Yours too, whatever they are! I am praying that God will help me to wear them beautifully and with grace. For I am His little spotted lamb!

The Moving Box


I put it out by the curb, this perfectly good moving box. I tried to throw it away but I couldn’t. I took about two steps away from it and then turned and retrieved it and put it back on the shelf. If I had left it out on the curb, that would have meant I was totally committed to six more years here until my retirement. This way, I have a small hope that it will happen sooner.

Sometimes we hold onto something small because it represents something bigger.

The box represents a dream. Of moving back to my hometown. A place of permanence. No more moving. Of spending some good years with my folks before they pass on….of building a relationship with my 7 year old niece, of being a real Auntie instead of a bit player in her life. Of buying a little home with a shelf for African violets, and maybe a garden.

Around the time I thought maybe I heard the call to go back, my home was sold at an unbelievable price, right before the bottom dropped out. God sold that home, not the realtor. Then things happened that made thinking of a move more difficult. The economy took a dive. California, my home state, is now in financial ruin. Everyday I hear the reports of friends there who have lost their jobs. And my job is secure, I have great benefits.

When I started with this company I never dreamed that God would place me in the job I have now. He literally placed me here, of that I have no doubt. I have no college degree, and yet He has given me success here for fourteen years!

Even so, for about 7 years now I have felt like one of the virgins with the lamp stand, ready for the knock at the door. I thought I heard the Bridegroom coming, several times. Maybe I did, and maybe I ignored Him. I get these thoughts:
But if he got me this job, couldn’t He get me another? Is my faith too weak? Is my God too small? Has my job become my god? All these questions run around in my head and I know God is tired of them, I know I am.

I wonder, did I miss the window of opportunity? Did I get the timing wrong? Did I not recognize His voice? Does that mean that He has balled up the master plan and thrown it into the throne fire? No more chances for me? Or is there a possibility that this is all part of the plan itself and I am right where He wants me to be for now? Are you tired, because I sure am.

Softly His voice speaks to my heart, “As I was with the Israelites in the desert so am I with you. I led them with my Presence as I will continue to lead you. I love you with an everlasting love that will never cease and nothing will ever change that.”

Maybe you feel like you missed a window of opportunity. Maybe it was a big one. God was not surprised by that. He is an expert at creating new windows.

“To man belong the plans of the heart, but from the LORD comes the reply of the tongue. All a man’s ways seem innocent to him, but motives are weighed by the LORD. Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your plans will succeed.” Proverbs 16:1-3

God cares about our dreams, and longs to give us the desires of our heart. Right now the desire of my heart, even more than my dream is Him. His ways, His path is what matters most. It is the only sure place to step. So I will keep walking, keep lighting the lamp of His word. Keep praying. He has given me tremendous peace at times when I least expected it. And He will do the same for you.

Was there ever a time when you feel like you missed His plan? Did He work it out for good anyway?

“In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps.” Proverbs 16:9

The best reason to praise

Image by flickr
It happens to me at least once a day, especially this time of year with our Arizona monsoons……I am driving or walking and I see something in nature that makes me stop everything for just a moment and breathe a prayer of praise.

It’s a natural and spontaneous reaction that happens when you know that there is a God who is behind it all, and that even nature itself cannot help praising God. When I lift my hands or say, “Thank you God,” for a beautiful sunrise I am simply echoing what all of creation is already doing; praising our Creator for continuing to extend His mercy for one more day. Another day to hope, to believe in Him, to thank Him for His marvelous works and for our redemption.

One of the best reasons I can think of to praise God is because Satan absolutely hates it when we do. It’s like throwing cold water on the wicked witch of the west. He simply can’t succeed in anything he does when we are praising God.

The Bible has much to say about praise and not once does it say to praise Him only when things are going well. It just says to praise Him because He is worthy!
“But I will sing of your strength, in the morning I will sing of your love; for you are my fortress, my refuge in times of trouble.” Psalm 59:16

When Satan came before God’s throne in order to stir up trouble for Job, I believe he thought his victory was a shoe-in and that Job would surely cave in to despair and give up on God. But Job knew that whatever he was going through, it didn’t change who God was. He knew that in spite of everything, that God still loved Him; that for God to allow such grief there had to be a very good reason for it.

Absolute trust.

If you are despairing today, God has not left you. He has promised to be with you and see you through…

Another reason to praise is that we will be doing it throughout eternity, so we might as well practise now!

Then I heard every creature in heaven and on earth and under the earth and on the sea, and all that is in them, singing: “To him who sits on the throne and to the Lamb be praise and honor and glory and power, for ever and ever!” Revelation 5:13

Can you picture even the animals bowing their heads or lifting their paws in praise to their Creator? It could happen! How cool would that be?

Can you think of a time when it was very difficult to praise God and you did it anyway?

Faith like Noah

“In the six hundredth year of Noah’s life, on the seventeenth day of the second month—on that day all the springs of the great deep burst forth, and the floodgates of the heavens were opened. And rain fell on the earth forty days and forty nights.” Genesis 6:11-12

I am celebrating rain today. We finally had the kind of rain that people in the desert dream of. Sideways, torrential rain. All this rain puts me in mind of Noah. I am trying to imagine the kind of faith it would take to keep on building an Ark for anywhere between 55 to 75 years. (This figure was developed by a very smart Biblical research guy, not me.) I also could not find anywhere in the Bible where it says that the people taunted Noah while he was building it, but given the cultural climate I would say it is a strong possibility they did. The LORD saw how great man’s wickedness on the earth had become, and that every inclination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil all the time. Genesis 6:5

Ever had someone say to you, “You really believe all that stuff?” Referring to the events in the Bible. They look at you with a bemused mixture of disbelief and bewilderment, and sometimes downright anger depending on who you are talking to. You may as well have just told then that aliens had kidnapped you from your bed and then flown you back to earth in time for work.

All the while Noah just kept hammering away, mixing up more pitch and sawing up more cypress. And watching the sky….It must have been very hard for he and his family. Lets face it, if we are to be honest, even if a 8 foot tall heavenly messenger came complete with thundering voice and glowing countenance, sooner or later they go away and you are left with insulting crowds and a clear sky with no rain in sight.

He just kept building. Just like we keep on believing. We belong to the family of Noah after all. When we really start to count up the ways we exercise our faith on a daily basis, we realize we have quite a bit in common with Noah after all. We pray to a God we can’t see and we believe He answers and we look to the sky just like Noah did.

“Noah was six hundred years old when the floodwaters came on the earth. And Noah and his sons and his wife and his sons’ wives entered the ark to escape the waters of the flood. Pairs of clean and unclean animals, of birds and of all creatures that move along the ground, male and female, came to Noah and entered the ark, as God had commanded Noah.” Genesis 7:6-9

I wish I could have seen it. All the animals walking peaceably side by side, leopards, elephants, goats, crocodiles, as Noah stood by the door with his staff….Thank you God for Noah’s great faith, and for the rain.

Tuning in to what’s real


“Here and there among men, there are those who pause in the hurried rush to listen to the call of a life that is more real. How often have we seen them, David, jostled and ridiculed by their fellows, pushed aside and forgotten. He who sees and hears too much is cursed for a dreamer, a fanatic, or a fool by the mad mob who, having eyes, see not, ears and hear not, and refuse to understand.

Only when we can no longer strive in the battle for earthly honors or material wealth do we turn to the unseen and more enduring things of life and hear and see the things we have so long refused to consider.” The Shepherd of the Hills, Harold Bell Wright.

I recently found a little treasure of a book published in 1907 about a worldly traveler who longs to escape his sophisticated city life and retreats to the Ozarks where he meets some people who teach him how to truly live. Leaving behind a successful church in the city, he ends up finding his faith and God in the mountains.

While there he meets Pete, the child who claims to speak with God, who wanders at night under the stars and hears the voices that whisper in the wind. When I look at this picture I can just see little Pete standing there in the sun. We can all learn something from the Petes of this world.

I talk to God all the time and though I have never yet heard an audible voice, I know He answers. The main way He answers me is though His word, but He uses other creative ways as well. I think I am going to listen to the wind more, and tune in to the song of the stars that sing. I am going to try to be more like Pete and tune into the Eternal world where God lives. I might be surprised what I hear!

“When I think of the wisdom and scope of God’s plan, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father, the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth. I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will give you mighty inner strength through his Holy Spirit. And I pray that Christ will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in him. May your roots go down deep into the soil of God’s marvelous love. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love really is.” Ephesians 3:14-18

Dealing with Disappointment


We have all felt the weight of disappointment. It’s crushing, sometimes debilitating. When it’s due to circumstance it is frustrating enough, but when it is caused by people we care about, the hurt sinks deeper. It may be that they have no clue of the depth and impact their decision made on you. But there is One who does.

It washes over you in waves. You think you are over it, then you get another reminder, a text, a phone call. You want to tell them, “Hey, I am still smarting from this, while you seem to be going about your business as if everything is normal.” I am not okay yet.

There is only one thing we can do with disappointment, and that is to lay our battered heart at the cross of the One who knows how it feels. Talk it all out with Him. He knows how it feels to be disappointed over and over again by people. But He gave that to the Father. Somehow I think He did this when He went alone to quiet places to pray. I think He did this often, to renew His strength. To keep going, to keep loving, no matter what the cost.

Stand on the shore today, if only in your mind. Feel your disappointments wash away and be taken out to sea with every cleansing wave. Know that you will heal because of your relationship to the Healer.

Jesus was disappointed by people everywhere He went. He more than anyone knew the capacity for failure in the human heart. But He never stopped reaching out, He counted the cost and He figured we were worth it. He knew we would disappoint him, but it didn’t matter, He knew He must keep offering love.

Give your offerings, your every disappointment to Him today. Let the Holy Spirit bind your heart today with His peace.

“When he rose from prayer and went back to the disciples, he found them asleep, exhausted from sorrow. “Why are you sleeping?” he asked them. “Get up and pray so that you will not fall into temptation.” Luke 22:45,46

Surprised by joy


Here I am Lord and I’m drowning
In your sea of forgetfulness
The chains of yesterday surround me
I yearn for peace and rest
I don’t want to end up where you found me
And it echoes in my mind
Keeps me awake tonight

Jesus can you show me
Just how far the East is from the West
Cause I can’t bear to see the man I’ve been
Come rising up in me again
In the arms of your mercy I find rest
Cause you know just how far the East is from the West
From one scarred hand to the other. “East to West”, Mercy Me

This morning my prayer room felt empty. I lit my candle anyway as an offering of faith. It was mustard seed small. I prayed, wondering what I did wrong that I didn’t feel Him there, to make Him turn away. I waited in the silence. So intent on myself and my feelings I forgot to leave room for the Holy Spirit.

Sometimes I think God hides Himself a bit just to see what we will do.

I think sometimes He plays hide and seek in order to encourage us to flex our faith muscles and pray anyway. I waited…..I praised some more, I read the Psalms. I sang…..He surprised me with His joy leaping up like John in Elizabeth’s womb. What mercy. What did I do to deserve this lavish grace?Absolutely nothing.

Then I think, why me? What about the one who prays for days, weeks, months, and never seems to get any confirmation that God is listening? That is dangerous thinking. It is all too tempting to think I did something to get this reaction. I do this, He does that. Like a formula. But God doesn’t work in formulas, and he certainly doesn’t wait around until I hit the right combination of steps in order to reveal Himself. He reveals Himself in His own time, and His timing is always perfect.

He does it because of His great love and grace. Because He loves giving gifts to His children. It pleases Him to do these things. There is nothing I could do that would make God do anything. Or not do something. But here is a very important reason why God reveals Himself in our lives…..so we can encourage and build each other up!

The Bible assures us that He will answer in due time. I entered my prayer closet empty and came out filled….
“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened. “Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him.” Matthew 7:7-11

Has there ever been a time in your life when you felt God was hiding His presence?

Rejoicing today in His eagerness to give good gifts: #393 peace in turbulence, #394 perseverance in difficulty, #395 assurance of Scripture, #396 confirmation that He hears, #397 unexpected joy, #398 laughter when all else fails, #399 dear ones to pray with, #400 His strength in my weakness.

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Lost Sheep

“He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young.” Isaiah 40:11

I am always looking up facts about sheep because the more I read the Bible, the more I see that there are endless illustrations about sheep, shepherds, lambs, pastures, and sheep gates. It goes on and on. The latest fact I learned was that the Shepherd sometimes breaks the legs of the lambs. At first that sounded cruel, well it still does, but then I found out why they did it. It was to make it easier to carry the lambs on their shoulders in order to keep them safe from predators.

I can’t eat lamb. I tried it once and didn’t like it. Probably because I was envisioning a little face like this in my mind. I can’t eat veal for the same reason. But my main point was, (and I do have one somewhere) is that sometimes God allows certain things to happen in order to put us in a safer place. And sometimes after repeated warnings, He lets us wander in the wilderness for a bit so that He can teach us a valuable lesson, but it hurts Him to do this.

I can remember times in my life when I have felt, so scared, so surrounded, so vulnerable. This life can be a scary place, and sometimes we do feel totally alone. Vulnerable to the shadows of night, aware that unless help comes we are finished. Everything becomes distorted…requests become harsh demands and all fingers are pointing at you. Mercy is nowhere to be found. But never fear. Your Shepherd has counted and found that you are missing, and even now he is bounding up the path, staff at the ready.

Feel his strong arms lift you into safety today as you nestle in the warmth of His love, hammering hearts of panic slow and rest in His own strong heart’s rhythm. Know that whatever happens, you remain in His safe place.

Simplifying


I was thinking today how complicated everything seems, even the church. Every day I see terms associated with the modern church that leave me confused, and I am one of the ones in the church! I can’t imagine how those outside the church feel. No wonder they are confused and disillusioned. I just heard a new term today, the Organic Church. I have no idea what it means, then there are these terms associated with the church today:
Emergent Church
Post-Modern Church
Mega-Church
Conservative and Post-conservative
Liberal and Post Liberal
Reformed
Charismatic and Neocharismatic
Calvinism
Arminianism

Those are just a sprinkling of terms I found and those are general terms that don’t even include the different denominations themselves. No wonder people are confused about Christianity. Sometimes I think it would be a whole lot easier if all churches had one name….”The Way” with a simple fish on the front.
Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, “This is the way; walk in it.” Isaiah 30:31
The important thing to remember is that behind all the differences of denomination and styles of worship, we are all one church.

Lord, I pray that we can be one unified church so that You might be glorified on this earth. May we continue to be a light in a dark world that needs You. I pray that we can use love as a filter through all of our differences. Thank you for Your Holy Spirit who makes this possible. Amen.

“But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.” Acts 1:8

Celebrating the church today and all the important ways we are the same…..believing that He is risen, and that we will rise too, that we have forgiveness through His work on the cross, that we must trust Him daily, confess our sins, know that we are unworthy but He is worthy, lifting our hands, bowing our heads, praising His name in the sanctuary, that we remember what He did through communion, enter into new life through baptism, death swallowed up in victory
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