Feeling a bit like Jesus

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Yesterday, I felt a little bit like Jesus must have felt.  I felt an ache for humanity. I’m not sure why I feel this way some days more than others. I think it must be because I am watching someone slip away and it’s not pretty. It’s not slipping away quietly, it’s more like hanging on for dear life. I have never watched something like that before.

Lately every time I turn around, something else stands as a reminder of how quickly this life is passing by. A memorial service on Saturday……and then this week, my Mom lost two more friends. My brother said when he heard, “Well, now he can see his son Royce again.” I had forgotten that his son had passed away at 16, the same age as my brother was. So many years ago now.

As I went about my day yesterday, I somehow felt people instead of just seeing them.  

At the car wash, I saw a man checking the trash cans. When he caught my eye, he looked a little sheepish and I looked down, embarrassed for him, saddened. I wondered what led him to this point. When he passed me, he gave me a smile and said, “How many people look at your car and yell Slugbug?” I said, “Many…..” and gave him a smile. There was so much more I wanted to say.

That’s one of the reasons I want to keep my car.

And then I had a wild urge to ask the person next to me pumping gas if he knew Jesus. So what if he thinks I’m crazy?

Maybe being a little bit crazy and saying something is more sane than knowing people are going to hell all around me and acting like it’s no big deal.

My Grandpa used to go up to strangers and ask that all the time. He died when I was 2. Oh how I long to meet him in Heaven. I hope he will be one of the first I see.

At the store I saw a really, really big lady in one of those ride-around carts. I am not happy to say my first thought was tinged with judgment. Then I said a silent prayer of forgiveness and gave her a smile. I have a feeling maybe she doesn’t get many. She gave me a beautiful smile back. My heart panged.

And my heart kept panging all the way home. And I finally cried because of what we are going through right now with Elaine’s Dad. I hadn’t until then.

The truth is, none of us knows when God will call us to hang up our hat for good on this earth,  but what I do know is that this life lasts about as long as a daffodil, here today and gone tomorrow, and hopefully with Him.

Let us treasure what we have.

Let us treasure who we have.

Let us bring Heaven to earth by putting aside all our disagreements and hurts, our disappointments and failures to love each other well aside.

Because it’s all just too short.

“I, even I, am he who comforts you.
    Who are you that you fear mere mortals,
    human beings who are but grass,

Isaiah 51:12

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8 thoughts on “Feeling a bit like Jesus

  1. Hi Lori,
    It is good that our heart breaks for humanity. Look at all the pain in the world. Look at all the people rejecting Jesus. We know what their future holds if they don’t repent. I know Jesus’ heart breaks too. Time is short, lets keep on fighting the good fight till He calls us home. Thank you for sharing your heart and have a blessed weekend.
    Ken

    • Thank you Ken, I so enjoy hearing from you. Yes, this world so needs Jesus. It always did, but for some reason now more than ever. At least that’s how it seems to me! I have one day left of work and then Sunday-Tues off. So looking forward to it! Lori

    • Ohhhh, thank you so much Jennifer. Somedays you just feel the weight of the world I guess more than others because of things going on in your own life. I love seeing your daughter’s on FB, it is clear they have the love of the Lord burning bright, thanks to their wonderful parents. They are blessed! Love your words…..thank you for being such a bright reflection of His love.

  2. Beautiful full-of-the-love-of-Christ thoughts, Lori. A very large lady – too large for any of the seats in the room – arrived to the courthouse shortly after I did earlier this week for a juror summons. I wondered where she might sit, and sure enough, she didn’t sit anywhere. That must have been very hard for her to stand, but she had no choice. I was embarrassed for her. Yesterday I was in the city with my husband and we saw a man who was clearly too large for the seats in 5 Guys, but he squeezed himself anyway. I’m can be silently judgmental, too, but I was overcome with compassion for both of them. It must be so very difficult to live like that.

    • Yes, I can’t imagine it. I gain a few pounds here and there but I have known people with serious weight problems and it is so hard.Thank you for your very compassionate response to my post. God loves you. I pray that He opens my eyes to people more and more. Thank you Patricia…..so much.

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