Because He lives, life is worth it!

“Oh, that my words were recorded, that they were written on a scroll, that they were inscribed with an iron tool on lead, or engraved in rock forever! Job 19:23,24

I am continuing my reading through Job. It is slow going, but that is okay. It is tempting to skim through Job. It’s painful reading…..As I read through his life, I am starting to feel like I am watching a dear friend suffer, and it hurts. Job wasn’t just a very wealthy man with a large family, he was also well known for doing good in the community. He was actively involved in taking care of the poor, opening his home to others, sticking up for the underdog. He wasn’t satisfied to just  sit back and enjoy all of God’s blessings when he knew others were suffering and in need.

It is tempting to skip through the long winded speeches of his so called friends. I want to tell them to be quiet! But maybe I am being too hard on them. There is truth in much of what they say, I just don’t think much of it applies to poor Job. Anyway, I can learn from their words what not to do. There is a time to speak and a time to comfort in silence.

So I am going slow. I am going back when I catch myself scanning instead of reading….because every word is important.

Right after Verse 18 when Bildad winds up his speech, Job starts speaking again. And his words stun me because I always thought this verse came from Isaiah. In the midst of his excruciating suffering, the Holy Spirit speaks a beautiful prophecy spoken through the dry, split lips of suffering Job. Like manna from Heaven the words float down…….

I know that my redeemer lives,
and that in the end he will stand on the earth.
And after my skin has been destroyed,
yet in my flesh I will see God;
I myself will see him with my own eyes—I, and not another.
How my heart yearns within me!
Right there in the middle of Job……. a well known aria from the Easter portion of Handel’s Messiah! I know, I know, there are people, Biblical scholars, who say that this has nothing to do with Jesus, but I disagree…..I think that Job knew exactly who his redeemer was, and that he also knew that when his time on earth was through, that he would see the One who redeemed him. He knew like one who has been through the refining fire of suffering knows……He lives! And maybe it took the suffering for Job to know that he truly did believe….
To echo the old song that I used to sing in church…….”Because He lives, I can face tomorrow.” Because He lives, I can get up and go to a stressful job. Because He lives, every day is a gift. Because He lives, it’s all worth it! “……And life is worth the living, just because He lives!”
And lest you beat yourself up because you feel you should be leaping out of bed instead of praying face down on the carpet, remember this: “There is now no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus“…..That was one of the first verses to spill out of the CD player this morning on the way to work. I take great comfort in the fact that He doesn’t love me because I am perfect, but because I am His child!
In the end, Job got his prayer answered. The book of Job is considered one of the most beautiful literary works of all time. His words stand the test of time and eternity……

Photo by Andrea Schafthuizen, public domain pictures

A Sparrow Story

Paul Harvey relates a modern parable about a religious skeptic who worked as a farmer:

One raw winter night the man heard an irregular thumping sound against the kitchen storm door. He went to a window and watched as tiny, shivering sparrows, attracted to the evident warmth inside, beat in vain against the glass.

Touched, the farmer bundled up and trudged through fresh snow to open the barn door for the struggling birds. He turned on the lights and tossed some hay in the corner. But the sparrows, which had scattered in all directions when he emerged from the house, hid in the darkness, afraid.

The man tried various tactics to get them into the barn. He laid down a trail of Saltine cracker crumbs to direct them. He tried circling behind the birds to drive them to the barn. Nothing worked. He, a huge, alien creature, had terrified them; the birds couldn’t comprehend that he actually desired to help. The farmer withdrew to his house and watched the doomed sparrows through a window.

As he stared, a thought hit him like lightning from a clear blue sky: If only I could become a bird – one of them – just for a moment. Then I wouldn’t frighten them so. I could show them the way to warmth and safety.

At the same moment, another thought dawned on him. He grasped the reason Jesus was born.

And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we beheld His glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father, full of grace and truth. John 1:14

A walk through the weeds…….

Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect. Romans 12:2

We humans can turn on a dime. Yesterday I was counting blessings, participating in the One Thousand Gifts over at Ann’s, thinking positive, counting blooms and blessings. Today on my walk, it seemed all I could count were weeds! I saw the brown trees this years freeze destroyed. I saw weeds in several yards…..My mind was like a ticker tape of negativity……”Why doesn’t the park enforce their own rules?” and “Why do we even have a home owner’s association?” I went on like this halfway around the perimeter until something strange happened. I got ticked at myself.

Something happens when you really start to count gifts. It changes how you think, and you no longer want to think the other way, the old way. We talk about paradigm shifts a lot at work. That is what happens in your mind when you cross over to living a life in gratitude to God, when you keep count. It not only changes your thinking, it changes your life.

It is a new determination you have……not to give in. So I walked on determined not to see the weeds or the brown trees this morning. I told myself and God that I was not going home until I started seeing beauty and blessings. I am kind of stubborn that way. Do you suppose that was God’s plan for me today?

This is what I saw…….A dove nesting in a spiny cactus……..groups of quail walking across the road. A bunny eating the veggies someone had left out. I heard the cry of a cactus wren, I call them all “Renny” for the one who lived in the cactus next door. Here is the thought that came to me…….These little desert creatures scurry about very happy to be what they are. They don’t pay attention to the weeds unless they can find something useful about them. If they can’t eat them, or use them for shelter they ignore them.

That was my lesson today.

I just had to laugh last night, as I picked up Elaine’s Mom from the nursing home where she had just visited her husband of 60 years, “That man is the most negative person on the planet, he finds absolutely no good in anything.” What?? This from a woman who is equally negative about anything and everything. Once, the three of us were walking along on an impossibly beautiful sapphire blue sky day. Elaine made a comment about how beautiful the sky was, and her Mom said caustically, “Well, Elaine the sky is always blue.” We still joke about it.

Like she says…….”Where did I come from?” She learned to count blessings a long time ago, against all the odds. Despite her surroundings, despite the people who raised her.

Yes, Lord……despite our circumstances, surroundings……..we can be positive, it is possible, if we let the counting, and God renew our minds.

Photo credits: Public Domain Pictures
Weeds by Andrew Schmidt
Dandelions by Petr Kratochvil

The List Can Wait…..

You can’t always get away and sit by a restful stream in the mountains……
but you can always find a moment to kick back and be like a cat.

put the list aside for later……sometimes later is okay.
Sometimes the time is right…..
A little slice in the day.
Just make room.
Sydney approved of my plan…..He said it was a very good one.
He even settled down to let me read a bit!
 Sometimes letting yourself break away for just a few precious moments, makes the day a little celebration all it’s own. Cats have mastered this……
I am learning from them.
Keeping count in my heart today, in gratitude for all these moments. I don’t want to let them just slip by unnoticed because they will never come back. I am determined to learn to live in the present.
I want to shrink the amount of time I look back unless it is to treasure a memory.
And minimize the time I look forward, unless it is with my eyes firmly fixed on God.
Who holds all the future.
Celebrating thanks today for every moment I have been given thus far……

holy experience
all pics taken with iphone

Shining Through

“I am grateful that despite everything, a lone bird singing at dawn can still move me to tears. The sight of a crescent moon in a sapphire sky can still take my breath away……”
I was feeling emotional this morning. A dear friend lost their cat early yesterday morning. She lifted her head and meowed once and then layed down as if she were asleep and that was it. It’s funny how the death of a pet can let loose all the emotions that have been stuffed down for everything else. It’s like you feel again, everyone you have ever lost before. Death is just so unnatural.
A bird sang alone as I opened the door to leave this morning at around 5:20. It brought me to tears. I have often written about how I feel that birds are little harbingers of hope given to us by God….to remind us that life is always, always worth it. So when I heard it sing this morning in light of all that has been happening, and Allie dying, and changes at work, I was reminded again. God is the glorious backdrop of everything else.
And though I feel the joy of the Lord burning inside me when I think of all the wonderful things He has done for me and continues to do, the challenge remains. How to get that joy to spring forth so that it spills over onto others. Lately I haven’t recognized the person I am at work.
How do you shed the light of Jesus when you’re at a place you are not excited about being? In general, I am very excited about being here on the earth, about what God is doing in my life. But then I get to work and I feel more like a wet blanket. I see the person I should be at work, and the person I am, and I feel the gulf between them. Too many times, I keep my light hidden at work. I feel like a firefly beating around in that bushel Jesus was talking about.
We all have bushels in life, what’s yours?
The challenge remains, how to get the light that is inside my heart out to others?
The place of prayer is the place I go when I can’t find the answers, there, and in the wisdom of the Word that brings life…..I hope something is shining through even when I can’t see it myself.
How do you let your light shine in challenging times?
“In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.” Matthew 5:16
You are missed, Allie! Thank you for the joy and comfort you brought in your six years of life…..

Jesus didn’t preach grey sermons

I believe that every absolute truth Jesus spoke, was spoken in absolute love……….

and sometimes with tears streaming down His face.

Our culture is becoming increasingly more uncomfortable with absolute truth. We get nervous when bold statements are made. In mixed crowds we feel the need to be careful, to make people feel at ease, comfortable. But much of Jesus time on earth was spent making people feel very uncomfortable. So uncomfortable that He was almost stoned (John 10:32) and pushed off a cliff (Luke 4:29).

I found a post yesterday on Matt’s blog, click here that I just have to share. I think it is the best post I have read in a while because I have been increasingly uncomfortable about what I have been hearing from some popular Christian pastors and leaders today. I hope it speaks to you as it spoke to me, it was really like a breath of fresh air blown into my soul.

Things Jesus didn’t say:

I am one of the ways the truth and the life

You don’t have to come through me to get to the Father

If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you profess your faith and are saved. Romans 10:9,10

Couldn’t resist, I love those pesky seagulls……all pics from public domain pictures

Twenty five years down the road……..

Facebook find #1

I met her at Jazzercise and we formed an instant connection. We loved working out, buying all the latest workout togs at the local dance store. We watched movies together and she and her husband attended church….the same church I went to. They had their problems, like any couple. They had an adorable little baby boy and moved into a nice home. It seemed they had a charmed life. She was a bridesmaid at my wedding and we had a great time selecting dresses and doing all the fun stuff that goes along with it.
After my husband passed away unexpectedly, we parted ways a bit. Maybe she didn’t know what to say to me and  maybe I should have tried harder to approach her. Maybe my tragedy made her uncomfortable. I still saw her at Jazzercise, where she brought her new little girl, Jordan. She had golden ringlets and huge blue eyes. A perfect child for a perfect couple, in a perfect life. Things were no longer the same between us.
I found her again on Facebook just yesterday. I didn’t “friend” her, I think some friendships are best left in the past. She is divorced and both she and her husband are remarried from what I could see. Her little girl is no longer innocent. Her profile page was loaded with a few shall I say, very colorful expressions. Nothing about God. Nothing about church. But she is beautiful, and my old friend still looks great too. But it saddened me. I know that with divorce comes sadness, pain. And we were close once.
A second Facebook find…….
Her Dad did my husband’s memorial service. He was a wonderful and kind man, with a great sense of humor. I attended the church where he was a Pastor shortly before moving from California. I will never forget how often he used to stop by my folks house to see me after Jody died. He was softspoken and often emotional, a very sensitive man. He was not the best preacher but nobody cared, the love he and his wife had for the Lord shone through in their love for others. They had two daughters, and later, twin sons. Shortly before I moved, the daughter got married to a great guy, a youth Pastor. She borrowed my wedding veil which I was overjoyed to let her use.
Flash forward to now…….She is still married to the same man all these years later, and they have two or three kids. On the FB news feed I saw that her husband, Rick just finished another missions trip to Africa, where I guess they have been several times. When I read of her life, I was happy for her parents, because I know they don’t have to worry about her life. She and her husband belong to the Lord. On her profile there was nothing you couldn’t show anyone, including her parents. Things like camping, coffeeshops, scrapbooking, and no swear words.
Two lives, two reactions. One of sadness, one of joy and hope.
I know what I got was at best an incomplete snapshot of what is really going on……but I think it told me a lot. Only time will tell how it plays out for any of us, but with God’s grace we do the best we can. We know who waits for us at the end of the road….
“Watch your life and doctrine closely. Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers.” 1 Timothy 4:16

Information Overload

“This is my comfort in my affliction, for Your word has given me life.” Psalm 119:50

I think it’s good to have information, but sometimes you can just reach the point where you say, enough! You can read so many opinions and so many commentaries, and so many people expounding on other people expounding, that you can get literally worn out. That how I was last week after about 2 hours of surfing Christian websites. After awhile, all the words started to swirl around in my head. It was like they were all fighting for places to attach themselves. I like what my Pastor used to say, “Don’t believe me, go and read the Bible for yourself!”

I really respected that. This was a very educated man, but he knew that the real teacher of the Word is the Holy Spirit. When you open the Bible and your heart at the same time, amazing things can happen. That evening last week I got in the car for the commute home, with my mind still swirling, and put in my Bible on CD. Driving in my car, listening to the rhythm of the road, and the rhythm of the Word, I felt the familiar warmth still the fluttering in my mind.

What I needed was the healing balm of the Word, and nothing else. It filled the cracks, made my desert soul an oasis once again.

Information and opinion are good, but nothing beats the truth of the Word. I don’t want to be like these guys……

“May we know what this new teaching is that you are presenting? You are bringing some strange ideas to our ears, and we would like to know what they mean.” (All the Athenians and the foreigners who lived there spent their time doing nothing but talking about and listening to the latest ideas.) Acts 17:19-21

One step at a time…..

My days off have become a bit different. They used to be somewhat free-form and abstract, now they are more task oriented. I had tasks before, but now they are oriented around someone else, not me. When you take on the role of caretaker that’s what happens. At some point in life we all find ourselves in that role. I think there should be a Caregiver’s Anonymous Club. Alzheimer’s and Dementia needs a special group all its own.

Yesterday I was exhausted by noon, and all of it was mental. I lay down and slept blissfully for about 30 minutes in the middle of the day……It was wonderful.

If someone had seen the flowing dialogue in my mind as I went through the day they would have thought, “Surely, this is no Christian.” I drove 60 MPH in a 45 MPH zone because I was so anxious to be home. I said swear words in my head at other drivers. I found myself tempted to lie about what day it was because I knew she wouldn’t know the difference in order to get out of Bingo. Don’t worry, I didn’t. The truth of the matter is that some people expect you to act like Joel Osteen all the time if you are a Christian. Truth be told, I bet he has his moments too.

The difference is, we have the Holy Spirit to help us in those times where we feel out of control. Someone to help us in our weakness. So we pray, we take some deep breaths, we confess our sinful thoughts, and we go on. Step by step, task by task. My Mom once confessed to a friend that she loved Vodka Martinis…..She gasped and said, “But you’re a Christian!” To which my Mom said, “Yes, but that has nothing to do with my taste buds!” Precisely why she has never kept it in the house. She has been a caregiver all her life, and I am sure there are times when she would have liked to pour a stiff drink in the middle of the day. That’s reality. God understands that, and that is why He knew we would need the help of the Holy Spirit, and each other.

Because sometimes life just gets a bit overwhelming.

That’s why I sent out the prayer SOS yesterday morning. Thank you to the absolutely wonderful responses I got, (you know who you are). One of the best things about being in the family of believers is the wonderful prayer support. The day ended up much better than it started…..So, thank you.

“We always thank God for all of you and continually mention you in our prayers. We remember before our God and Father your work produced by faith, your labor prompted by love, and your endurance inspired by hope in our Lord Jesus Christ.” 1 Thessalonians 1:2,3

Prayer Request

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13

I have a special prayer request from my blog family today. My best friend Elaine is struggling under a heavy load right now. She just started a new job, which was a very good opportunity she didn’t feel she could pass up, but now she is wondering if she made the right decision. She also has what feels like another full time job, taking care of her folks. She is wondering now whether she should have taken the job at all…….and also wondering how long she can do both without it adversely affecting her health, which is it already doing. Today she cut off her unemployment, and it feels final. No more safety net.

She thought she would be able to ease into her new job, but they loaded her up the first day, knowing she had experience. The prayer she needs most right now is to learn to let go. To learn how to leave work when things are unfinished. To let it all go at 5:00 and not carry it home, where the other job, the other stress  starts.

I feel helpless. I can help, but only so much. It is the internal struggle and burden she alone carries that I can do nothing about. But I know One who can. And she has prayed about it, over and over. What do you tell someone who is carrying this kind of burden and has no clue how to unload it? It is all too easy to speak platitudes: “Just give it to God….” I know she already has. I wonder why God doesn’t just do a miracle inside her and fix it. I ask myself, “Doesn’t He know all the things she is doing?” But I know He does. It just seems to me He is biding His time. She needs help now.

And yet, I see all He has brought us through since all this started.

And I know He has been there, and will continue to be.

The statistics of caregivers dying before the ones they are caring for are way too high. I have heard it over and over again. I don’t want her to be one of those statistics. She doesn’t want to be either. She has too many others who depend on her. God knows that.

Thank you in advance for praying. I breathe thanks for all He has brought us through today. And for what I have learned from this thus far:

That maybe I am more of a caretaker than I thought I was….. that I am doing things I thought I could never do……that in spite of it all, there is still joy and laughter to be had……. for extra leaning on the Lord for our strength…..for noticing beauty in the midst of quiet moments of rest……for appreciating even more the support of good friends…..for the prayers going up from dear friends and family……for extra physical strength and steady attitude…..for hope to see what God will do through this…..extra understanding for others going through the same struggle….and for the Lord who holds my friend and me in His palm……#656-667

When he falls, he will not be hurled headlong, because the LORD is the One who holds his hand. Psalm 37:24

holy experience