Friendship

How to stay young at heart…..



Willow tree angel of the heart
Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it…….Proverbs 4:23
My best friend Elaine and I recently re-connected with some dear people who were some of the first that we met when we came to Arizona years ago. Ruby sold Mary Kay and I ran out of lipstick! We had an instant connection cemented by lots of laughter. I don’t know why we lost touch, and it doesn’t really matter. Life has a way of carrying people in different directions sometimes, but I always believe that God loves to orchestrate reunions too. What a blessing it was to find that none of us had changed much, and our hearts had not changed at all! It seemed to me like the last 8-9 years had dissolved and that we were all standing in the same spot we were when last we met.
Isn’t it a blessing to have friends like that? Ron and Ruby will be the first to tell you that “old age ain’t for sissies.” They have had their share of health problems and surgeries, but they have retained the secret of youth. Laughter, their love for the Lord and each other, staying in the Word, (both are leading Bible studies), keeping up on current events, watching the Pastor’s  four children and learning new things. Most importantly they have not forgotten how to laugh at themselves! They don’t allow their own problems to consume them, but realize the importance of listening to others concerns and joys.
Their home is strewn with signs of life, children’s toys, open Bibles on the table, books with markers in them, paintings and new photos on the walls and cookies in the jar. Even though they are in their seventies and probably have many aches and pains, they dress sharp and they stay positive. They know the Source of hope! Theirs is a home full of life, a house of hope. A place where you want to take off your shoes and stay awhile. They have figured out the secret of staying young at heart. We all know youth won’t last, but our hearts can stay young forever. That is something we have control over!
Have you ever visited a home and a people that have given up? You can’t wait to get out the door!
What a blessing it is to re-connect with old friends, and what a blessing to find that all the important things have not changed; for it is the Spirit of God that draws us together. No matter what our age, background, cultural differences, the Spirit of love binds our hearts and dissolves the differences that the world wants to put between us so many times. We have become a society that seeks to separate…..Sometimes we separate ourselves, and that is never good. There is so much we can all learn from each other at every age!
Thank you God for bringing us back together with our special friends at just the right time……….and thank you for the magic of laughter, which came just as easy as it ever did to us all, even after years apart, what a blessing!
So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Philippians 2:1,2

“You will not find a soul mate in the quiet of your room. You must go to a noisy place and look in the quiet corners.” Robert Brault

Taking a little trip……

“Friends, they cherish one another’s hopes, they are kind to one another’s dreams.” Henry D. Thoreau

Since I don’t have a picture of myself anywhere on this blog I thought I would post this one. In it is the wonderful lady I talked about yesterday, Pat. (In red) Sorry, couldn’t find one of both of us looking into the camera! My best friend and I are heading to California today bright and early to surprise my folks with a visit to celebrate my Birthday. I am sure I will see Pat too because as soon as she hears I am in town she will want to come see me and give me one of her lingering hugs. When she hugs you, she is never the first to let go!

It’s always good to touch bases with family and friends, and sometimes you just have to do something spontaneous! I am not really a spontaneous person, I like things planned and scheduled. That is where I am comfortable. But this will be great fun and I can’t wait to see the shock and surprise on their faces when we walk up the driveway.

Aren’t we a jolly bunch? Best friend Elaine on left, another dear friend Diane, and myself at my Mom’s 80th! I picked this one because even though my eyes are closed, this photo makes me smile. We all had a great time that day…..

“Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.” James 1:17

Making peace with my spots

My Mom and her dear friend Pat were conversing over coffee, when something in the conversation prompted Pat to say, “I have never liked myself.” She said it softly, looking down at the table. I must preface this to say that Pat is one of the most giving, loving people that I have ever met. When Pat says “I will pray for you,” it is no trite statement, she says it from the depths of her innermost being.

My Mom had her Bible on the table, so she opened it to Psalm 139 and started reading aloud. Then she got to this part:
For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be. Psalm 139: 13-16

Great tears slid down her cheeks, for she was convicted. Pat loves God with a depth that knows no bounds. When she read those lines she knew that she had failed Him and it crushed her.

Since that day her whole countenance has changed. She feels differently about herself now and it shows. Even her daughter noticed the difference! Now she is sharing the message with others. Her new found freedom is infectious. Her enthusiasm has infected me to pass it along…..and learn.

So today I am taking a lesson from Pat, and my Mom. I have never liked my skin. It has given me problems since I was twelve years old. Severe acne plagued me up until such time as they invented Accutane. That drug was a miracle for me….I also have large pores and freckles. I have always coveted beautiful skin. You know the kind, no pores at all, looks like porcelain. My dear friend always leads me around the cosmetics section at Dillard’s and Macy’s. She knows how I feel.

I am making peace with my “spots” as they call them in the UK. All of them. Instead of saying or thinking, “I hate my spots,” I am going to say, “I am fearfully and wonderfully made, and my skin has made me the person I am today.”

God created my spots, and He created Yours too, whatever they are! I am praying that God will help me to wear them beautifully and with grace. For I am His little spotted lamb!

You follow me…..


“Peter turned and saw that the disciple whom Jesus loved was following them. (This was the one who had leaned back against Jesus at the supper and had said, “Lord, who is going to betray you?”) When Peter saw him, he asked, “Lord, what about him?”
Jesus answered, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me.” Because of this, the rumor spread among the brothers that this disciple would not die. But Jesus did not say that he would not die; he only said, “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you?” John 21:20-23

Jesus and Peter were walking along the shore, birds flying overhead, water lapping gently…..I can almost see the expression on both Peter and Jesus’ faces when Jesus said, “What is that to you, you follow me.” Jesus never had a problem getting right to the heart of the matter. I can imagine Him looking right at Peter and then Peter looking down because He realized that he was being admonished. I don’t think Jesus said this harshly, I think He probably had his arm around Peter when He said it. He was trying to get Peter back on track, back to focusing on Him. Just what we need to hear today. It is so easy to lose focus, but I feel His steady gaze turned on me now. “Lori, what is that to you? You follow me.”

But Lord, what about when I feel so overwhelmed I can scarcely take a breath….
You follow me
What about when I can’t see where I am going….
You follow me
The pressure is blotting out all my peace….
You follow me, for I am going before you today.

My yoke is easy and my burden is light. Matthew 11:30

Why do you think Peter was concerned about what would happen to John? What are some of pitfalls of comparing our lives to others?

The Red Swing


My Mom does not believe in hiding in the backyard. She does not like closed, shrouded windows and shades drawn tight. She once visited me in New Mexico and she almost ran down the street chasing strangers she was so desperate for someone to talk to. It was a “nice” neighborhood but nobody ever went out in the front except for the little girl who brought her guinea pigs out. It really was almost comical, now that I look back on it. It could have been set to music…..everyone came home, garage-doors came up, swallowing entombed drivers and sucking them into the abyss, never to be seen again. “How does anyone expect to get to know each other when they’re all hiding in their backyards?” She has a point.

Back home, life is lived out in the front. There is a picnic table between their house and the neighbors, and it is used by about four families nearby. Mom’s new neighbor sometimes brings homemade scones out in the morning to share. Bible studies have been held on it; and lots of playdough has been pounded into it with little fists, it is also a jumping launch for the kids.

Mom decided she wanted a deck out in front, plunked right on the lawn so she could sit out there. She has a hard time sitting on the uneven ground due to humongous tree roots. So it was built. Then she saw it……The Red Swing. She has been painting everything red for the past few years or so. Her latest acquisition before the swing was the Red Sink which she is very proud of.

My Mom mentioned it to Yvonne, her grocery checker. Now her friend. One day my Mom started talking to her at the store and a spark was ignited, something shared. Something that drew them close as only the Holy Spirit can. She told Yvonne about her new deck and the swing she wanted. Well, it was close to Mother’s Day, and Dad was doomed from the start. Yvonne came by after work with a bouquet of red flowers and made him promise to get her that red swing.

Now everyone uses it. The other night my Mom was getting ready for bed and she heard the neighbor girl singing softly….out in the swing. Another night, some other neighbors were walking, whispering, with another child. Pretty soon, they were quietly swinging as well.

It is a real neighborhood, not without its squabbles, disagreements or differences. But something profound takes place there called life. Community. Shared dreams, heartaches and hopes. When I recently went back, we had a party for my brother’s Birthday. Invitations were sent word of mouth, the best kind. People came bringing food, wine and smiles.

Mom made sure she had her tunes, Big Band blasting forth from the top of the clothesdryer. The firepit was lit….hands were held in a circle of prayer. Grace was there in that gathering of neighbors, and a feeling that we were not just neighbors and friends, but family.

With a red swing out front……

True friendship


After years of vain familiarity, some distant gesture or unconscious behavior, which we remember, speaks to us with more emphasis than the wisest or kindest words. We are sometimes made aware of a kindness long passed, and realize that there have been times when our Friends’ thoughts of us were of so pure and lofty a character that they passed over us like the winds of heaven unnoticed; when they treated us not as what we were, but as what we aspired to be. Henry David Thoreau

It is truly an honor to have a few friends who truly see me the way I wish I were. Sometimes I take them for granted, brushing by them with a smile and wave. But each of us knows that underneath the topical layers of life lays something unspoken, something pure and true. That in times of need or crisis, or maybe joy, that something would leap to life. If I asked them to pray I know they would not hesitate to grab my hand and bow right then and there. In one magic instant my cares would become theirs.

A faithful friend is the medicine of Life. Ecclesiates 6:16