Bible

Fighting the Change

This day I call the heavens and the earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live 20 and that you may love the Lord your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the Lord is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to give to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. Deuteronomy 30: 19,20

I awoke this morning with a familiar feeling, one I didn’t like. I was flat. Not happy, not depressed……just flat. I am in the beginning stages of that place in life known as, dare I say it? “the change.” Sshhhh, I won’t say it out loud. I didn’t use bold face type or big letters. It is not a real uplifting topic for women, (or the men who live with them.) But it is a reality.

I had a choice in that moment. To settle for how I felt, or to fight for something better. That is what it really comes down to each and every day. A choice for life or death. Victory or defeat. So I got up, grabbed some coffee and sought life in the pages of the book that was lying on the floor by the bed. The one that gives life…….I flipped open to Corinthians and there I found this verse:

“For thanks be to God, who always leads us to triumph in Christ, and manifests through us the sweet aroma of the knowledge of Him in every place, for we are a fragrance of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing.” 2 Corinthians 2:14,15

God has taught me that I don’t have to settle. I don’t have to slog through the day feeling like this.

I can have victory in Christ.

As I rustled through those pages, I started to feel more like life and less like death. And I realized something else. If I had settled for that feeling?  I would have missed the beautiful fragrance that the people in my life are giving off,  because they are making the choice to get up and give life to me. And I don’t want to miss it.

I don’t want to have to apologize because I have been so focused on myself that I don’t see the hurt in your eyes for being ignored, not appreciated, not valued.  

We all have heard about muscle memory. Trained athletes know it. The muscle remembers. But so does the mind.  

That is what I remembered with tears this morning on the way to work. I remembered how I had to fight for life after my healing from anorexia. The healing of my mind had to come first, but then I had to begin the long battle of healing my body. You don’t starve your monthly cycle away without having to work hard to get it back.    

I remembered getting up in the dark before anyone else was awake, and running….just running. In the cold and in the dark all I heard was my feet slapping on pavement and my heart pounding, my breath coming out in puffs. I didn’t want anyone to see me because I felt I was repulsive. I had ballooned to 125 pounds from 80, largely from fluid buildup that came from wreaking havoc with my hormones.

But morning after morning, I got up, I went out, I fought back.

And today, I can smile on that victory. Because God heard the prayers of hurting parents, and He heard me too, down there hitting the pavement. He was with me.

Later, after I felt a bit more confident my Dad went with me. It was good, just he and I running together. And someone else I didn’t even know was watching too. I later learned that my future husband watched us run from the window of Flame liquors where he worked for years. After we met he told me this. Life is amazing isn’t it?

I can rejoice now in the suffering, because of the victory at the end. Because much of life is getting back up over and over again, no matter how you feel and fighting back, because you know life is always worth it.

Restoration and light and life waits at the end of the road. And once we’ve come through? We can help each other find the way out.

When you have had part of your life ripped away is when you begin to know the true value of it.  

All over the world today, people making the choice. Some even when it would be much easier to choose death.

Choose life with me today?

Two Cups with God

 
In the midst of the mess and the beauty of life, He listens,
 He enters into my world and I enter His.
 Two cups with my Father,
two cups with Jesus,
two cups along with the Spirit……
He sups with me and I with Him,
a window of Heaven cracked……
 
Prayer Journal
 
 
The devotional reading I picked for myself today was 1 Corinthians Chapters 1-3. It reads much like a letter from a grieving parent. Paul has spent his own time, money, and resources for 18 months in Corinth. He knew that there was a lot at stake. If the church could take root in Corinth, it could take root anywhere. A city of around 700,000, it was full of every kind of philosophy, thought, religion, as well as every kind of sexual morality you could think of.
 
Certain things were happening in the Church that deeply troubled Paul. They need to be reminded of who they were. It seems they had a case of “spiritual amnesia.” Certain people were queuing up to follow the church leaders instead of Christ. Some followed Peter, some followed Paul, some followed the dynamic new person on the scene, Apollos. Still others followed Jesus.
 
Right now we are in the midst of an election year. We listen to the speeches, we hear who speaks the best, who looks the best, who is the most eloquent, who says what best matches our philosophies and beliefs. But no politician has the power to save us, and neither did any of the church leaders of Paul’s day.
 
But Jesus does. He is our hope, no matter what happens in our economy, our country, our world.
 
Sometimes, like the Corinthian church, I need to be reminded of who I am and who I believe. I take comfort in Paul’s words today.  It is so easy to get swept up in the worries of the world and all the different voices clamoring for our attention.
 
I need to be reminded that what I do matters and that wherever I go, I am taking God with me in the presence of the Holy Spirit.
 
I love how, even though Paul is brimming over with frustration, he is also brimming over with love and thanksgiving.
 
”To the church of God in Corinth (or America), to those sanctified in Christ Jesus and called to be holy, together all those everywhere who call on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ–Their Lord and ours: Grace and peace to you from God our Father, and the Lord Jesus Christ.” Paul
 
 


Big Red

For the word of God <sup class="crossreference" value="(A)”>is alive <sup class="crossreference" value="(B)”>and active. <sup class="crossreference" value="(C)”>Sharper than any double-edged sword, <sup class="crossreference" value="(D)”>it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Hebrews 4:12

I hold it to my chest, knowing what it contains……..all the mystery and words of life. I felt the power it held as I pressed it close. I would open it, but not yet.

Content in the weight of memory within, I hold it close and feel all the years behind it. It was my first real study Bible, one I bought during a Walk through the Prophets study at my church. It was the most beautiful book I had ever seen. The day I carried it home was April 19,1980.

When I first got it, I devoured it. I read it for hours. I loved the delicate rattle of the pages and the gilded edges when they caught the light of the lamp.

All these years, it has been by my side, though there were years when I left it untouched on the shelf. Even so, I knew the words of life that it contained. I had felt that lifeblood of its pulse flowing through my life. I could never deny it.

For these words are alive with the very breath and Spirit of God.

I have other versions now, but when I need to feel the hope of all that God has brought me through, the Red Bible, “Big Red” I call it, comes out. It is the best prescription I can think of for a heavy heart. It’s amazing really, how I can feel better just by holding it. The words within hold the healing, the hope. I know that without cracking the cover.

It holds memory, it holds life, it holds me.

The verses highlighted in yellow, the ones I clung to when I did my first solo in church, the personal notes I scrawled in the back on special days, things I never want to forget are there.

This old friend is in me and I am in it, I feel it as I hold it close. Tears have spilled on its pages and they do now too, as I remember the times it brought me back from darkness, death. Notes of mine are co-mingled with my Mom’s from when she borrowed it. That makes it even more precious.

I think of all the promises held in the Bible, and how each and every one is true. It is the one thing we can always count on. What in the world gives us that kind of hope? In the beginning was the word……and the word was God……and even beyond eternity it will still be there.

Last year it came unglued from the spine and I had to glue it back on…….and the leather cover is more pliable with every passing year. But its still the most beautiful book on my shelf.

I am celebrating His promises today, won’t you join me?

Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away. Matthew 24:35

So is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it. Isaiah 55:11

The grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of our God stands forever.” Isaiah 40:8

I tell you the truth, until heaven and earth disappear, not the smallest letter, not the least stroke of a pen, will by any means disappear from the Law until everything is accomplished. Matthew 5:18

Looking back to what’s ahead…..

“Keep your face to the sunshine
and you cannot see the shadow.
It’s what sunflowers do.”
by Helen Keller

Been thinking about………Soft answers. And how the Bible says they turn away wrath. All this time I was thinking it was to turn away the hearer’s wrath, but maybe the whole point is to turn away the wrath of the deliverer as well.

There is always more behind what Jesus says. The Bible is filled with layers. The more I read it the more layers and meanings God reveals.

Life sometimes feels like it’s going frightfully fast. I find myself wanting to stop the stream of it, plug the hole with my finger to keep it from flowing, rushing past……stop it in midstream. And yet I want to move fast forward to retirement. Maybe, I think, life will move more slowly after that. If I can only just get there.

Meanwhile, during the night our minds manufacture dreams through our fears, joys and sorrows. I dreamed one night that I had pulled up to a campsite bulletin board. You know the kind where people put their paperplate message on the board so you will know where to find them? Except I awoke, heart pounding, because I realized they were gone and I could not go where they were.

They went to the place of too much time gone by……Aren’t we all drifting there, even now?

I wonder? Is that part of what drives us to write? To stop time, freeze the moment. Never forget?

These days I find getting older brings a certain comfort. Comfort in knowing the truths I have believed for so long have been verified, proven true. Only years and experience teaches that. Not any school that I know of, except the school that God puts us through.

The more I read the Bible, the more it becomes alive. The more try to live it, the more I know it’s true. And when I clutch it to my chest I can actually feel it saving me. It is a book like no other, it is pulsating with life…..

Redemptive power of both the redeemed and the Redeemer.

And this is one song that has no end.

The song of the redeemed. Let Heaven and nature sing.

Wishing you a bit of grace

Not much going on around here…..just hanging out waiting to see if there is anything good coming out of the fridge!

Actually, I am at work. Briggs is the one just hanging out. More than likely right now he is dreaming of chasing mice or catnip…..

Until I can get a bit of time to post, I am at my desk.

Hope your Saturday is going wonderfully……

To all in Rome (and the rest of the world) who are loved by God and called to be his holy people:

Grace and peace to you from God our Father and from the Lord Jesus Christ. Romans 1:7

The other morning before I left for work I grabbed a Bible CD from my bookshelf. I saw that it was Romans so I put it back, (I thought) since I had just read that. When I got in the car, I heard “Romans Chapter 1”

And I was glad, because you can never read the book of Romans too often.

Happy Saturday fellow bloggers and readers!

Wisdom from Ecclesiastes

There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven–Ecclesiastes 3:1

Those who love money will never have enough. How meaningless to think that wealth brings true happiness! The more you have, the more people come to help you spend it. So what good is wealth—except perhaps to watch it slip through your fingers!
 
It is better to say nothing than to make a promise and not keep it.
 
Don’t make rash promises, and don’t be hasty in bringing matters before God. After all, God is in heaven, and you are here on earth. So let your words be few.
 
I also noticed that under the sun there is evil in the courtroom. Yes, even the courts of law are corrupt!  I said to myself, “In due season God will judge everyone, both good and bad, for all their deeds.”
 
I guess they felt the same way about their system of justice back then too!

After reading Ecclesiastes, it would be easy to imagine that this writer, “the teacher” as he is called, suffered from severe depression…..and yet, if you can get through the weariness in its pages, there is much wisdom here. Though at first glance it seems to be filled with the ultimate futility of life, behind the words there is shining evidence of hope. Hope in God that is.

And there is even some very sound financial advice…..what investor would disagree with this?

Send your grain across the seas,and in time, profits will flow back to you. But divide your investments among many places, for you do not know what risks might lie ahead.

And this is some really good advice for people who tend to be worriers, like me.

When clouds are heavy, the rains come down. Whether a tree falls north or south, it stays where it falls.Farmers who wait for perfect weather never plant. If they watch every cloud, they never harvest.

The man who had everything was indeed very wise, he realized that when all was said and done, even with all his wealth, all his stuff, all his palaces, and women, and vacations, that without God, it was pretty much worthless. And that even enjoyable stuff is much more enjoyable when you acknowledge your gratefulness to the God who gave it all to you.

all verses from the New Living Translation of the Bible

Life is Good Because He is…….

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us for adoption to Sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves……
In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us. With all wisdom and understanding, he made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ,

to be put into effect when the times reach their fulfillment—to bring unity to all things in heaven and on earth under Christ. In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, in order that we, who were the first to put our hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory….

 And you also were included in Christ when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. When you believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to the praise of his glory. Ephesians 1: 3-14
There is nothing I can add to this!

Eight Words

Since you have purified your souls in obeying the truth through the Spirit in sincere love of the brethren, love one another fervently with a pure heart, having been born again, not of corruptible seed but incorruptible, through the word of God which lives and abides forever, because……..  
      All flesh is as grass,
And all the glory of man as the flower of the grass.
The grass withers,
And its flower falls away,
But the word of the LORD endures forever.”
1 Peter 1:

I have felt out of words lately…..and that’s okay because sometimes you just like drinking things in.

There is a time for contemplating….watching……listening……absorbing.

There is a season for that as well as writing. After all, before the writing comes the feeling. So, this morning I thought since I had none of my own words, I would go to God’s word.

And somehow, that seemed to set things in motion.

The Word brings the life, and the life gives birth to words.

God stirred my heart up and I saw people around me differently. Sometimes I need my eyes opened. Well, most of the time I do.

I went to get gas and drive my car through the wash. For some reason when I got gas it didn’t give me the option of getting a wash so I went inside. The nice gal I see in there all the time was busily working away. I always notice how helpful she is. I explained the situation……and as usual she was very accommodating. We talked and joked, and I went to get my wash.

While the soap suds were flowing down my window……..God kept bringing her to my mind.

The Spirit said, you should let her know that you appreciate her….that she is doing a good job. I said, I will tell her next time.

He said, maybe she needs it today.

I went back in. I let her know that what she does is noticed……appreciated.

As I was drying my car I saw a man coming out of the store. He smiled sheepishly, as if he wanted to be friendly……once on the way in the store and once on the way out….I think he wanted to say something nice. But I got the feeling that maybe he didn’t know if it would be appropriate. Men have to worry about that now. About how we might take it, I guess. I gave a smile back.

He was driving a cement truck. Just a hard working guy on his way to a job. Not an easy job either. He touched me. It touches me how he is part of me, part of our country. How we are all part of each other when it comes right down to it.

Maybe I am feeling a bit protective of our country lately. It seems almost popular to beat up on America….at least it seems that way to me. We are all just doing the best we can here. Dealing with prices going up on just about everything we buy.

But we won’t give up. We will keep going, keep trying. We will do the best we can……..Because it’s the right thing to do. Because giving up is not what America has ever been about.  

So tomorrow I may get impatient and suck in my breath at how others drive on the freeway, but right now I love everyone. And I think it all started when His word sparked a fire that leapt to life with these eight words:

Love one another fervently with a pure heart.

God keeps a journal

“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was with God in the beginning.  Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made.  In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.” John 1:1-5
I thought of this verse this morning as I rushed over to the golf course to get this shot minus the power lines that continuously block my view. Because I love the written word and everything about it, this verse holds special meaning to me.

The written word has power, tremendous power. It has power to start revolutions and wars, forge relationships, mend hearts and lives, and with the right person behind them, words can become laws.

Words can open up a whole new universe of ideas to someone who never knew such a universe existed. Philip Yancey, in his book “Finding God in Unexpected Places, tells of reading “To Kill a Mockingbird,” among other books, and discovering a whole different world and thought……ideas that were previously foreign to him, being raised in a very racist church. His world was changed.

There is one word though, that set this whole thing in motion………….God’s Word. It started it all, and it will continue throughout eternity. God’s Word is the final word. What is more, the Word is living breathing flesh. The living Word is Jesus.

“The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.” John 1:14

The more you read this verse, the more there is to wrap your mind around.

Before God even uttered one word, the Word was already there………

When we write, we take part in the creative process of capturing thought and bringing it to life on a page…….we have the privilege of joining together with God and doing something really good.

Words can bring life or death. They can be life affirming or spirit killing…….and the words you believe will make a difference in where you spend eternity.

“Then those who feared the Lord talked often one to another; and the Lord listened and heard it, and a book of remembrance was written before Him of those who reverenced and worshipfully feared the Lord and who thought on His name.” Malachi 3:16

Who’d have thought that God kept a journal?

What Lasts Forever

“For you have been born again, but not to a life that will quickly end. Your new life will last forever because it comes from the eternal, living word of God. As the Scriptures say,

“People are like grass;
their beauty is like a flower in the field.
The grass withers and the flower fades.
But the word of the Lord remains forever.”
There are so many warnings in the Bible about staying focused. God knows the world can knock us off-kilter. It has the capacity to swallow us up and spit us out whole if we are not careful. This morning I read, rather, listened to, the book of Jude. It was very sobering, and all the more when you realize it is written to and about those inside the church, not outside it!
I know the capacity of my mind to wander, leave the trail, go off in a different direction. I go after grass that seems greener, not seeing the steep drop off on the other side until it is much too late. 
Something can seem righter than rain to my own heart, my own intellect…..until I see it the way God sees it, and I can only see it the way He sees it when I am immersed in His word. It is my magnifying glass that allows me to see myself and the world more clearly. It settles me, sets me right again.
Since I started commuting, I have started listening to it on CD. I can’t express what that has done for me. As much as I love to read, usually 2-3 books at a time, I am extremely lazy when it comes to reading Scripture. But I can listen to it for over an hour a day and cover a lot of ground. I figure, this is one thing that is making a change in me for all eternity. It is the mysterious process known as the grafting in of the Word of Life.
This is a change that is not temporary, this is a change that will last forever.
The only single drawback to listening to Scripture instead of reading it is that I sometimes get sidetracked by how the voices sound. I loved the way the reader of the book of Jude sounded this morning. He had a good “Jude” voice…..thunderous and emphatic without being too dramatic. On the other hand, I find the woman’s voice who reads 1st, 2nd and 3rd John very annoying. I actually have to read those books because I find her voice so distracting.
The woman who reads 1st and 2nd Corinthians has a British accent and she is great. I tend to want to hear her again and again. She sounds like a combination of Maggie Smith and Cate Blanchett. Imagine Lady Galadriel reading Scripture!
See how easy it is for my mind to wander? I think I need to read more…..Hmmm.
“Now all glory to God, who is able to keep you from falling away and will bring you with great joy into his glorious presence without a single fault.” Jude 1:24
Have a peaceful day everyone!