Answered Prayer

Be Grateful

In Prayer this morning I was reminded again that I have a heritage in the church that I am so grateful for. As far as I look back, I have memories of being with God’s people. Were they perfect? Not by a long shot, but in those hallowed whispered halls of quiet, I learned of God. I heard the stories of David, Samuel, Noah, so much so that they were not strangers to me. WOW, I grew up and realized that not everyone has that. I am SO grateful for every church that I attended, no matter the denomination, folks. Denominations, I believe, only seek to divide us, but we can glean what we can from them anyway if we are open to what God would teach us.

I was thinking what a wonderful thing that heritage is to pass on to the next generation. It only takes one generation to forget God entirely. I guess my point is, be grateful that you have any memories of church, however restrictive you think it was, you heard the Word spoke, and that will never move through your soul without lodging itself somewhere. That somewhere will come out when you least expect it in the words of an old hymn you thought you forgot about. Thank God that someone took you there. Maybe it was VBS where all you remember is gluing colored macaroni together to make a picture of Jesus. Thank God for it.

I remember, oh how I remember now, and I didn’t think much of it then. The rustling of choir robes right before the first note. The procession of the Cross and the Acolytes down the aisle in my short stint in the Episcopal church. Christmas programs and the brown paper sack filled with treats, and nervously trying to remember my verse when my turn came. The night my mom didn’t give in when I wanted to wear my ratty jeans to church. The large line waiting to see the very charismatic Pastor John at my aunts church. My Baptism and the way the white robe billowed around me, and proclaiming my faith at 13 barely knowing what that entailed. God chased me my whole life and now at (almost 66) I have entered an even deeper knowing of Him because a year or so ago, I realized that playing around with the world was not what I should do.

I am SO thankful today. God has been made real to me so many times in my life. Two very pronounced ways, once when I was healed of Anorexia, and once on a quiet foggy morning in an empty house near Christmas where I had an encounter with the Holy Spirit that I don’t talk about much and I will never forget. And now He has drawn near to me again, fulfilling His promise in James that says:

Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double minded. James 4:8

And think about this, His Holy Spirit takes up residence inside us when we invite Him in. No matter how we have strayed or lost time, God is faithful. He won’t remind you of it, He will only welcome you back with open arms and redeem the years. That’s the kind of God we serve. I am so grateful for those Pastors and Teachers who speak the Word faithfully. Getting involved again with a Bible Study has been the best decision I have made. Listen to those wonderful sources that have the Living Water flowing through their veins. If you want to know what is going on in Israel today give these wonderful folks a listen here, and if you want sound Biblical teaching from a wonderful friend of mine go here

That is my offering today, folks. Have a blessed and peaceful weekend and remember, God is making all things new as we speak…..Where there is breath, there is hope.

Left at the Altar

(A writers lament)

In my mind I see an altar swept clean……I come before you Lord, waiting, wondering, why I find my altar stripped bare of words, bereft, swept clean. Maybe now I can write what is only for You. Maybe that’s what you wanted all along. I misplaced the words, but You can find them. Arrange them on Your altar of Holiness the way you want them, Lord. 

Fill the place in my soul that aches, tears that have dried up spring unbidden to my eyes as I acknowledge that place I remember. That calm before dawn where I sat with the cat in the swing. Nature calls but I hear traffic. Transform it Lord into something you can use. 

A Holy offering of love. I hear You say, “Those tears will do. “ Sometimes there is a Holy Gift exchange. I do believe that when we give something up here on earth, there is a rift in the clouds of Heaven. This is something I know. God has answered my prayer this year and I am eternally grateful. He has replaced my thirst for alcohol with thirst for the living water that never fails. 

I am the Samaritan woman at the well. Thank you, Jesus, that this well will never run dry. 

Oh God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you; my flesh faints for you, as in a dry and weary land where there is no water. Psalm 63: 1

The Law (that leads to the cross)

“Oh, that they had such a heart in them, that they would fear me and keep my commandments always, that it may be well with them and with their sons forever!” Deuteronomy 5:29

This is God’s lament because even as Moses came down from the mountain with the first draft of those tablets that God fingerprinted Himself, He knew it wasn’t to be. He knew it wasn’t remotely possible. It’s human nature after all. You are cruising along in life; all is well until someone (or God) tells you something is forbidden. Even if you hadn’t thought about that “something” whatever it is, now it has your focus.

We’ve been studying Exodus in our Bible Study and as always, I am stunned and amazed at what I have culled from pages I thought I knew well. I have found that I have taken the Ten Commandments for granted. The questions are soul piercing at times. Here’s one:

How different would the world be if we followed these statutes?

The world would be instantly transformed. There would not be much news to report. If any.

As I was meditating on the Word this morning, I thought of the phrase, “All is right with the world.” Is that even remotely possible looking at the world today? It’s a fictional phrase I’ve read in many books, and maybe it used to be much easier to believe that somewhere in the world at least, the statement could be true.

We know that it isn’t. Even as we click off the news we go about the business of living and do what we can to make things right in our own world. We take comfort in the smallest of moments. We string those moments all together; we gather them close like skeins of the softest yarn, and we hold them close to our face to feel that softness before stuffing them all back in the basket.

Today I was feeling kind of distant from God. I’ve actually had a string of those days. Being a believer for so long, I have better learned to weather those days. I know He loves me, I know He’s promised to never leave, and I rest on those promises daily. I also know another thing about our Heavenly Father. He knows how to give good gifts. He specializes in unexpected moments of reassurance to surprise us. (Don’t kid yourself, these little gifts come from Him, they are not accidents)

Today I started a book. I have started and stopped so many lately. They were all MEH. This one was promising and delivered the comfort I my soul was craving. Two English girls go looking for God and a missing woman in their neighborhood FULLSTOP. Complete with assorted characters in said neighborhood. Another FULLSTOP. At last reader Mecca. GIFT.

My joy increased as I played Pandora Praise to run and get a Dutch Bros for my Bestie, (sticker day, y’know) I prayed for the people I saw pushing their carts full of stuff, I prayed for the animal shelter workers who never get a break. I prayed for the Dutch Bros peeps. And then I heard Lauren Daigle sing about “Not Enough” and even though I feel the same most of the time, I know that Jesus plus nothing makes me more than enough. ANOTHER GIFT.

I wish we could post those 10 Commandments everywhere, because I know if people followed even half of them, it would be a much better world. I also know (and this is the most important part) that without Jesus, we couldn’t even hope to follow even one of them. God held up the Law as a mirror into our impossibly corrupt hearts and Jesus stepped into our place and fulfilled every last one. BIGGEST GIFT.

Read your Bible. Let it speak to your weary heart and soul. This world tries its best to beat us down, but don’t let it. Look for the GIFTS big and small.

Be Still and Know

This morning, I awoke kind of unsettled. I wandered around in the dim early morning light and gave the cats a snack. Then I poured coffee and settled in my chair with shades drawn. It wasn’t time for light. Yet. I felt “Meh” and I didn’t feel like praying. I just sat. Sometimes just the act of being still is exactly what God wants us to do in that moment. So, I just sat. Just so happened that my dial landed on Ecclesiastes today for my reading plan. Perfect. God has a sense of humor, I knew that but sometimes you need to be reminded.

“Cease striving…….”

And don’t we continue to strive even when we are sitting still? Our minds are almost never inactive. As I settled into the quiet, (in my funk) I sensed the presence of the Holy Spirit, and I remembered another morning. He reminded me of when I was so irritated at the traffic noise, and He prompted me to transform my irritation into an offering of prayer. And so, I did. I prayed for every car I heard and the person behind the wheel. I started to feel a love for all those people hurrying wherever they were going, and all the problems and heartaches (and joys) behind each life. Then I heard the train come through and I prayed for everyone on it. I was transformed.

Even now, when I hear the traffic, I hear something different because when you allow God to work, He can change our normal everyday irritations into something much different. And I could ache like I do, for the pines or the ocean and go to go that quiet place, even my closet, and find that I have come out refreshed as if I had just spent time watching the waves crash upon the shore or hearing the wind making the pines sigh.

God uses what we have. And sometimes what we have is not much, but God is God so He can make our nothing into something if we invite Him with only a whisper of a prayer or an almost thought we don’t even remember thinking.

Then, one more thing happened as I sat down to write this blog. I heard David Nevue play “The Lion and the Lamb” and that song always wiggles me because it takes me back to when blogging was new and we were all like neighbors visiting at the back fence or on the porch conversing over a steaming mug of coffee. Those times were so sweet that it almost hurts to remember. But not in a bad way.

Friends, I hope you can glimpse a bit of eternity today. Pause and remember how it must have been when it was all so new. And how it can be right now as you invite God into your everyday normal and precious life.

Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. Philippians 1:2

Finally Home

Bless the Lord, O my soul and forget not all his benefits: who forgives all your iniquities, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from destruction, who crowns you with loving kindness and tender mercies……Psalm 103:2-4

The Rumba is working its way around the house, and I have two little kitties nearby. They have finally settled after wrestling and bouncing off the walls for the past 3 hours. One is sitting in the decorative bowl on the table and one right beside him. When we got them, they both fit! “They” are Atticus and Scout, respectively, and a constant source of joy, having been cat less since Briggs died in 2020. 

This is retirement, the first week in. Several times over the past few days, I have found myself in a state of wonder at how incredibly blessed I am, how at peace, how content. On my first walk around the park where our new (refurbished) home is situated I dug out my old iPod and selected the playlist I used to walk Desert Harbor in Arizona. It was like I was home, really home. 

Living in a very small space for the past 8 years really makes you appreciate the everyday things. A new washer and dryer that we almost worshipped the first few weeks. No more laundromat! Our own garbage can, for another. We never used the can at Aunt’s house because she was very fussy about her garbage. 

I’m home, I’m home, I’m home and I never have to move again. What a feeling……I can scarcely describe it. God is so good. At first, we kind of poo-pooed this park. It wasn’t as “perfect and pristine” as we liked. We had our eye on another in a neighboring town. It was well-kept and the space rent was lower. There were a few that came up for sale but inside repairs would have been costly. It just wasn’t meant to be.

Elaine wasn’t sold when we looked at this place, but I secretly thought “I could live here.” There was a kind of strange room off the living room. Back in the day it might have been called a “family room,” separating both sides of the house. Elaine turned in circles and exclaimed, “What is this room?” I am happy to say that it has become a beautiful library. (Pictures to follow in another post) Wayfair is our new best friend. Of course, you have to build whatever you buy and thankfully Elaine is very talented. I was the assistant handing tools and fetching screws and bolts.

First, we made an offer which they didn’t accept. Then it fell through twice more. We made another offer, with concessions and it was accepted. 

Here’s another strange thing. Over and over, I have had this dream for years of two big closets. I just go from one to the other with a sense of amazement in the dream. Well, yes, you guessed it. I have two walk-in closets. Thank you, Jesus! The second walk-in has become the litter box room and storage for Christmas.

Each day, I wake up so very, very thankful. Life is good on a Sunday morning in June. 

But I have trusted in your mercy; My heart shall rejoice in Your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, because he has dealt bountifully with me. Psalm 13:5,6

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The morning is quiet and the mockingbird sings, picking up the same endless melody he closed with last night.

David Nevue hymns play softly in the background and I am praying for my nieces little cat who is very sick. Seems to be something she ate. There are little teeth marks in the interlocking rubber floor mats in the bedroom. And now there is a big bill, but that pales in comparison to a girl who is heartsick. Oh Lord, sometimes we just get tired of all the sorrow. The world is weary. We are weary too. 

As I sit here amidst my tears there is a joy deep down resting at the bottom of my soul, in a feathered nest. It’s that quiet peace God gives. The living promise that He will never leave us or forsake us. That there is still joy for the taking. The assurance that in the end, all will be well.

I walk outside and see yet another mangled baby bird that will never sing a note. This is the fourth. Why do things have to die? I guess sometimes things can be rescued and sometimes they can’t. I think of the little mouse I saved one morning. Two bluejays were attacking it mercilessly. They would pick it up in their sharp beaks and then drop it to the ground. The mouse was terrified and when I went to pick it up it squeaked in fright. The poor thing didn’t know I was trying to save it.

I could feel its little heart beating in my gloved hand, and then it was my turn to be a little afraid. What if it ran up my sleeve? I hurriedly carried the stunned little creature to safety and settled it beneath some shrubs. I wonder if that’s how God feels about us? We fight so hard when He’s only trying to save us from ourselves. 

He looks down at the way we’ve chosen to mangle our world, our lives, and then He watches as we walk right past the gate that would swing wide and welcome us in.

He longs to pick us up and settle us in the only place we will only ever find peace and safety? “Rest my child,” He beckons. Finally, exhausted by all our own efforts, we collapse at His feet. He welcomes us, takes us as we are.

He’s the God of second, third, seventh, one-thousand chances. This morning I didn’t think I had any words at all. But God supplied a few, as it turns out.

The  train sounds in the distance, life propels forward. And the joy outweighs the sorrow once again. Despite everything, we have hope.  Pray with me friends? That a little cat a girl loves will be okay today.

A World in Pause Mode

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Life has been suspended and I can’t help feeling that for once, on this day it feels right. I remember as a kid when things closed and everyone flocked to church at noon on Good Friday. I also remember being glad when it was rainy or cloudy because that also seemed right on this day of days.

“Oh Jesus, what you went through so that we could have forever with You. When the shadow of the cross fell it reached all the way to Heaven and even silenced the Angels. They had never seen the Father hide His face from the Son. Ever. But that day was unlike any other day that will ever happen again.”

This shutdown has not been without benefit, in every adverse situation the good arises like a sweet perfume. The weeds grow along with the seeds, it’s just that the weeds are visible right away. But the good seeds are working their magic down below where we can’t see.  I believe we will have a lasting benefit from this time.

We will remember the quiet times, the books we read. The times spent talking, learning new games, getting to know each other again. Maybe all this family time, cooking and eating together, stretching our imaginations and praying more will have a lasting effect. Not to mention going a little bit crazy. 

What I’ve been learning from all this is what I have taken for granted, the simple little things. I have always been a person who has been intentional about not doing this and yet, I have realized that to some extent, I have. Who ever thought hugging someone we love would feel like a luxury, a risk, something forbidden.

Each morning. I have tried to go outside at first light and celebrate a little resurrection. I close my eyes and concentrate on all the noises I hear. It’s a blessing to have these mornings at home. Not having to get ready for anything. Downtime. Then there’s the downside.

Honestly some days it feels a little bit like the shadow of death is hovering all around us. Seeing loved ones only from a distance. Not being able to go, to help, to do. So close, so far away.

I’m thankful I have had someone (thank you E) to laugh and cry with during all this. It’s been a blessing to help those in our circle who are alone. 

I’m reminded in Scripture that this is only a light and momentary affliction. The other side of eternity stretches much further than we can see right now, but it’s still there, waiting for us. Because of the horrible, awfulness Jesus went through for us. Because He loves us.

The Trinity worked a beautiful plan my friends, and we can all partake of it. This pandemic will pass, but what will not pass is the empty tomb. It stands open and glowing with hope. Today we remember how our Savior was battered and bloody beyond recognition but on Sunday we remember how Satan was defeated.

Death has indeed lost its sting. Again. Thanks be to God.

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This is the mysterious thing about prayer.  It often happens even when you’re not intentionally trying to pray. It’s like riding a bike. If you thought about everything that goes into it you would probably not get yourself down the road. It’s like the other morning, wide awake at 2:00 AM. “I should pray,” I thought. “Why can’t I be more like those “Holy” people who get up and pray and seek God in the middle of the night instead of finding something to eat or drink or read?”

And this is the crazy thing. I got up and started talking to God about just that. Sometimes the best prayer sessions start when you’re not even trying. You’re just talking to the God who created you. Who knows us better than we know ourselves.

It’s reawakening to the knowledge that as believers, we stand saturated by Grace.  And that Grace never leaves us. Not even when we feel undeserving of it. We know we are undeserving and that leaves us breathless with thanksgiving once again.

This is the intimacy the Psalmists knew:

In the morning O Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation.” Psalm 5:3

But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation.” Psalm 13:5

For you, O Lord, have delivered my soul from death, my eyes from tears, my feet from stumbling.” Psalm 116:8

And my favorite:

O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thought from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down. You are familiar with ALL my ways. Psalm 139:1-3

I like to think prayer is what happens while we’re making plans to pray. You don’t have to have just the right setting or the right moment. The time is right now, today. In every moment; every time we thank Him for the weather, the birds, our health. Prayer is giving words to our very breath, as Acts 17 says: “In Him we live and move and have our being.”

It’s been awhile since I’ve posted and it feels good. If I can only move one person closer to knowing God with my words, then it’s all worth it.